Whew chile, 2 nights a week is rough.
If follower counts dipped after a mild villain run how bad is it going to be after the twitter gang gets a second night of yelling at Brandon and Pieper ("B/P").
Have we discussed yet how stunning Deandra is? I am fascinated by how she keeps it all so 'put together' day to day when everyone else is struggling...is the secret the braids? Do I need to get mine redone, if so I am booking a trip to my hairdresser (I have not seen her in almost 2 years thanks to covid). Pieper joins the intro
I just want to point out, Demi is bloody mean on this show we start with her calling Mari a loser yet Demi does not seem to get the heat that others get re losing followers etc...just saying peeps. examine yourselves.
Speaking of people coasting, is Kendall just here for Joe or do we give her the benefit of the doubt?
"How about a toast, cause I do the most, it's your newest host" this is how Tituss Burgess introduces himself with a mic and a song to the cast as their newest celebrity host.
Titus announces there will be a special VIP party and only a few from the cast are invited:
Becca, Aaron, Noah, Abigail, Kenny, Jessenia, Chris, Riley, Deandra (see my thruple comment from yesterday), James, Thomas and Demi...this means that Mari will not have time to work on Kenny but Demi will.
See the producers work hard, and Demi gets rewarded...Ivan suggests that the remainders crash the party.
Maurissa and Tammy are starting to worry that their men will not be 'faithful' to them while at the party.
Tammy pulls Thomas aside to tell him to have fun, but she really wants him to come back to her.
As someone who has partied at Mexican all-inclusives I recognize that generic club look that the VIPs step into. Demi is a real try-hard.
Tituss lets the crew know that he has guests and if anyone makes a connection with them the guests will move into the house and in walks - Chelsea, Alana, Alayah and Mykenna. Jessenia tells us that she is not happy that "Alana is here, she kind of threw herself at Chris in San Diego, which wasn't a good look I feel." San Diego is the new stage coach, mark my words!
Chris takes Alana for a walk and she tells us that she has "met Chris a few times, and I am interested in being more than friends." Chris is about to dog Jessenia out "she has been so sweet to me over the last couple of days." Jessenia in her ITM is putting the blame of any potential problems on Alana but Chris is the initiator of the kiss that happens with Alana and YOU KNOW A PRODUCER TOLD JESSENIA WHERE TO GO, she walks in on Chris kissing Alana.
Let's have a quick chat, BLAME YOUR PARTNER NOT THE INTERLOPER IF YOU ARE EVER CHEATED ON (Sure if the interloper knows about you they have some guilt but your partner is the one that owes you loyalty, the interloper can do nothing if your partner is unwilling).
Alana asks Chris "do you feel bad, do you wanna go back there?" Chris quickly says "no."
Chris finally goes back to Jessenia and tries to talk his way into keeping Alana and not having Jessenia burn the house down, he tells her he is unsure of his feelings with both Alana and Jessenia on his list coming into the show.
Alana tries to interrupt Jessenia's talk with Chris and Jessenia puts her foot all the way down and tells Alana that she has already had enough time with him so Alana has to wait.
Olivia Holt shows up to sing her new single via lip synching, it is rare that there is someone that we know who is performing, but I at least know Ms. Holt via her acting not her singing.
Chris and Alana start making out in a heavy way in front of the whole crowd, Riley (chyron says 'Works out') calls it disgusting the way Chris is now treating Jessenia. James says "The way Chris conducted himself, his behavior is suspect, Alana walks through the door and he kicks Jessenia to the curb." Deandra says it is feeling "Brendan and Piepery" that there is an existing relationship. I think Mykenna had one moment and no dialogue all episode.
Jessenia is so annoyed that she leaves the party and hops in a car to return to the beach. Jessenia's return and her report of the party scares some of the remaining women, Maurissa in particular is crying on the beach as Serena tries hard to comfort her.
Morning after; Mari seeks a party update from Kenny. Kenny tells Mari (a reasonable fear) that when he has the rose Mari is a 100% with him, but when she has the rose she is more open to change. Kenny says he has never "felt this feeling before" when it comes to Mari, they both say they would leave today with each other (obviously they will not). Demi spots the couple kissing and says "Kenny sucks, I am sick of it" and her outfit gets a black bar as she walks to the day bed to talk to Kenny.
"Why do you want her? The girl who is stuck up as [expletive deleted] like she is completely different than me." Demi immediately goes on the attack, it is not pleasant. Demi continues "she is a mean, mean girl, she is a pageant girl" taking shots at pageant women in this franchise means you are going to be swinging all day
. While crying Demi says "I am such a fun person" now that the breakup has happened "Kenny is the most immature 40 year old I have ever met in my whole life" but one hour ago he was okay?
We get night vision footage of Jessenia tossing and turning and crying on her bed "I cannot trust someone like Chris, as a partner or even as a friend, I cannot do it."
Tammy confronts Chris who is moping on the beach "What did you do?" Tammy takes a lot of heat but she rides for her girls.
Riley is talking to Joe and let's him know that he thinks Chris is a clown, he tells us that Chris' current moping around act is fraudulent. Mari now thinks that she and Kenny "have great communication" skills and counsels that Chris should have been upfront and speak about things like she and Kenny did?
Alana gets to come in and Tituss gives her a date card, as she walks in Jessenia says "why is she wearing a gown, it is hot out?" The venom is dripping, not least because Jessenia is wearing long sleeves as she says this.
The date card says "Keep bringing that big paradise energy." Alana immediately asks Chris on a date (ahem the Pieper special) but Chris says he needs to talk to Alana first. Aaron breaks down the connections "I am not a big fan of Chris right now" and "I am a big fan of Jessenia and Jessenia is not a fan of Alana, and I am going to say I'm on some gang sh!t with Jessenia and I am not a big fan of Alana either, she is making some waves." GANG GANG that's all I can hear in my head after Aaron.
Chris comes back to the group after getting ready for his date and many of them tell him to go talk to Jessenia (I am too lazy y'all it is going to 'Jess'). Chris now tries to talk to Jess but Jess tells him they have nothing to talk about. Before Chris goes on his date Tammy intercepts him "Don't be an idiot. You know what to do. I don't need to tell you what to do." Tammy anytime she thinks one of her Day ones needs to be protected...
RIP Michael K. Williams.
Date:
The couple goes ziplining. With Chris telling Alana "i don't even care what is happening at the beach right now...because I am hanging here with you." Back to the beach Joe is claiming that Chris asked him how he got popular.
And now Jess says "Alana has talked to me before about followers." The dreaded followers conversation. As Jess says Alana and Chris will "just be switching off roses for the next couple weeks" we see Chris saying to Alana "it will be a fun next few weeks" as they struggle to find a proper position for a makeout (and a dog yawns in the foreground) Alana tells Chris "you need to assume a dominant position" speaking of dominant positions 2 dogs start to eat the food that was prepped for the date.
Joe is saying that he is okay with telling Chris and Alana that they need to leave.
Becca jokingly tells Natasha re Aaron "stop flirting with him in front of my face" then they give each other a peck (podcasters unite). Becca is telling us that she thinks there is something there with Aaron so of course Chelsea comes down with a date card that says "The bigger the hoops the bigger the chance at finding love" while wearing massive hoop earrings.
Chelsea takes Thomas for the first chat, and Tammy is worried, then she takes Aaron for a chat and now Becca is worried. Chelsea selects Aaron and Becca says to the remaining group "You guys have been so fun take care" to the group.
Aaron and Chelsea are having a good date and while they are kissing we cut back to the beach with Becca lamenting that paradise is not like being the Bachelorette...NO KIDDING and now that she is not having oodles of fun with Aaron she is hinting that she wants to leave.
Now it is time for Tammy to worry about her and Thomas' relationship and here we have Tia bringing a late night date card to "Becca there is not better place than paradise for a fresh start." The producers saw Becca talking to Thomas at the VIP party the night before so they know she wants to talk to Thomas more.
Becca pulls Tammy aside first to ask her if it is okay to go on a date with Tammy, Tammy is super reasonable even saying "if you kiss him, kiss him" Tammy's follower count better be going up right now (is that how you do it?) Tammy's attitude is that if Thomas wants her he will come back to her. But there is a limit to how reasonable one can be and as soon as Thomas and Becca go off Tammy breaks down crying. Maurissa takes some shots at Tammy in her ITM saying she left Aaron for Thomas so she did it to herself.
Aaron is not doing a good look right now saying Tammy deserves the pain she is going through. To say this show brings out the petty in everyone is an understatement.
Back to the Chris and Alana situation (as Joe terms it) the remaining cast are calling Chris scum and a fraud. As soon as Chris comes back to the beach Joe pulls him to a talk with some of the other cast and Joe and Riley berate him and Jess rides in with them. Riley does not sugar coat this (though bro, this is really not your fight so I do not get the passion here but go off) "I believe you're a man with no honor, and no respect and no code" yeesh. "I know the spark you were looking for bro and it is clout...but it is F'd up the way that you did it." Alana tries to jump in "Does anyone want to know what I think?" the crew hits her with a quick "nope" so Alana walks off.
Jess tells Chris "pack your bags and leave."
Alana and Chris are on a bench together and Alana is broken up and tells him if he wants to explore things with Jess he should go, she is hurt (whether she is hurt that Chris put her in a bad spot or because she now realizes that she can never stay on the franchise for more than 2 days with any shows we are yet to find out). Chris tells Alana that he is thinking about leaving the show and Alana asks if he plans to leave her there alone, he tells her he wants her to come with him and we now get proof of 'the hurt' - Alana does NOT want to leave. Alana tells Chris "But I am gonna tell you right now that leaving paradise together means that you want to be in a committed relationship and after one day here I cannot tell you that." "Does me staying here literally mean that I avoid everyone and I have no friends?" Hate to tell you Alana but that is a strong possibility.
Chris goes off to pack and Alana walks off the beach morose and silently avoiding everyone. Chris sneaks out while everyone still thinks he is packing and gets in tries to get in a car only to realize he is trying to get in the car that has Alana and she tells him " Chris this is my car." That is a level of broken relationship when you will not even share a car to the airport.
Natasha is not feeling the fact that everyone rode for Jess and booted Chris but they do not seem to have the same energy for the Brendan and Pieper situation (easiest answer WE DO NOT PROTECT BLACK WOMEN, less so black men because really if this is the issue Jess should have been booted the minute she dumped Ivan for Chris after waiting for him).
Now that Chris is gone the spotlight is going to start coming back to B/P
Bloopers:
Kendal apparently has hairy legs and didn't "take a shower today because I couldn't be bothered" uhm Miss WHAT, you are on a beach, it is hot, sweaty, dirty and you are hanging out with other people YOU NASTY!
Whether you shave your legs or not is your business.
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