Infrequently updated consistently funny

Tuesday, June 04, 2013

“Right reasons, right reasons…I’m here for you girl for all four seasons.”

No way do I type as much as I did for the Bachelor episodes, because A. I am lazier and B. for now it seems rather boring.

The first date guy reminds me of a curious but timid puppy, he gets scared when he thinks Des is driving them down the wrong street…hey fellah you are on a street on a date with cameras following you, you cannot and will not get jacked. Then he becomes worried that she has plans to remove a barricade, again dude – TV show! OF course there is a band to play to them, and the guy thinks it will get better than this?

Des says she has never "juggled 14 guys at once" and I think “maybe I should search for the Des sextape”.

Good to see Soulja boy is getting work, his street cred was already shot, might as well completely kill it. They make a fake rap video, but if you saw clips of her outfit you would think Des was in a country vid. No need to talk much about that travesty except to allow me to indulge in a racial moment – the black guy was the absolute worst dancer, and I have no idea why Soulja Boy was there…did he write those lyrics?

“Here for the right/wrong reasons” we might set the record for that phrases utterance tonight. And this was written before I realized that the hook for the damn song was "Right reasons" shows how much this show numbs the brain.

Bryden goes on a one and one and tells her about his horrific car accident where he could have died and just happens to have glossy pix of his wreck with him! Look I nearly died in a car accident too, I have the facial scars from it, the horrific surgery/recovery story etc and yet I have never thought to bring it up on a date, and I certainly do not keep pictures from it with me…then again I am single and watching a dating show so eh, what do I know; Looks like it is time for me to start mentioning it to the lasses. Des has to tell him to kiss her – never a good sign for long term chemistry.

Apparently every guy has to share some personal secret tragedy with Des on their first interaction with her.

The guy who already has a rose (Ben) steals her away from the other guys who need the crucial time to get to Des before the rose ceremony. This leaves the guys pissed, and flummoxed and foolishly talking amongst themselves instead of stealing her back.

I recorded the show ‘Mistresses’ that is immediately following the Bachelorette because I really like 2 of the actresses in it, but no way can I watch that with this back to back. Have to watch something a lot more masculine before I can descend into the muck again.

Did the black guy talk to her even once this episode? I see him on camera a lot but I do not think he ever interacts with her. He might as well just wear a ‘Token’ shirt! Maybe Des saw his dancing and decided “Hell no”, I know I would have if I were a woman. Go high five the camera man on your way out, I do not think I can forgive you for that ridiculous B Roll of you walking around town high-fiving everyone.

The show ends with the completed rap video. Des’ body is great, that is the best thing I can say about this video

No comments:

Blog Archive

About Me

My photo
Cali-J ueber alles in der Welt. Some think that I am mean; (I call them friends), in fact I am not that mean. What I am is sarcastic and dry to the sandpaper level. I have friends that I have never said a kind word to their face, but I praise to the ends of the earth to anyone I know and will defend them to the end. That’s just how I roll! My boys know that I am down for them, my girls know that no matter what I will keep them safe (and occasionally flirt with them [If you are a female friend of mine and think I haven’t flirted with you it just means you didn’t notice, it was extremely subtle or…not yet ]). No one is safe from my sarcasm even my own parents; hence of course as a kid I spent a significant amount of time in punishment. I treat people with respect if I think they deserve it – everyone starts off with the same amount of respect from me (a lot). You don’t need to earn my respect; you have to keep my respect.