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Monday, August 04, 2014

The men tell all or really just what they think is safe enough to get them invited back

The ‘Men tell all’ begins with former contestants Ashley and JP showing up and I am grateful, I have to wake up early tomorrow and thankfully when the Bachelor/Bachelorette does these filler segments I can skip forward on my DVR...definite time saver. As I am skipping through I see that there is an ultrasound I stop for it I sigh heavily “these people will put everything on TV” bachelorette-men-tell-all-ultrasound
Why do I feel this is completely staged and that they previously checked backstage to make sure...what if it the doc started the machine and the baby was not healthy? Or he could not determine the sex (as sometimes happens)? No way they risked this without checking before.
bachelorette-ultrasound ( Pointed out, the dress is pre cut to make it perfect for the Ultrasound...yup FAKE)

Then time for an extended preview of Bachelor in Paradise - so much delicious crying.
Time to finally introduce the guys and I wonder how many will have scarves, I was planning to guess 4 then I see that they all have scarves on and I immediately realize that they realize we have ALL noticed the trend.
Marquel is wearing a chocolate chip cookie lapel pin...look homie I get it cookies are your thing, but enough! marquel-cookie-pin
The topic of Andrew allegedly saying “blackies” was brought up again.
Marquel and Ron both talk about their feelings on the topic. Andrew addresses Marquel and calls him Ron, immediately a bad look since there are ONLY 2 black guys (1.5 to be exact) and you are accused of demeaning both of them, you really should not get their names wrong.

It devolves into an attack on JJ with accusations of him being a tattletale - Andrew clearly knows the group dynamic and immediately knows that throwing JJ under the bus will cause other guys to join in with him. men-tell-all-jj
Chris Harrison tries to question Marquel on his true feelings about Andrew, Marquel plays the politician.

This episode is reinforcing my belief that these guys are all so boring, even a racially charged issue comes with little to no heat. What I have noticed is there is a distinct clique of guys with Andrew and they all seem to share similar backgrounds, I do not want to break it all down here but it is something I have spotted and cannot shake.  

Marquel’s time on the hot seat:
He admits that he did not realize that all the guys were kissing Andi, and that he played it too slow. Marquel ends his segment by pulling a tray of cookies out from under the couch and ‘serving’ the contrived and now thanks to the Andrew segment even more cartoonish than it would have been otherwise.

Marcus takes the hot seat he appears to regret introducing Andi to his family. Chris keeps pushing to see if Marcus wants to see Andi again. They plug his inclusion on Bachelor in Paradise (I am just going to start calling that BP or BiP [mind not completely made up]).

Chris takes the seat next (it really has not been hot at all tonight) - women are crying after the recap of Farmer Chris’ (FC) time on the show. While FC and Host Chris are talking, a girl just yells “excuse me Chris” interrupting the show and they stop the interview to bring her down to the couch, she claims to be from a small town in Canada and we are supposed to believe this is NOT a plant. andi-dorfman-the-bachelorette-season-10-84
Host C, sets up a speed date with FC and Small town Canada girl for during the commercial break. We know how little Andi likes sharing the spotlight, if Canada girl is still on the set when Andi shows up she is going to be pissed. Alot of girls in the audience look seriously pissed/confusedmen-tell-all-face
...and then we ‘restart the show’ with the countdown to tell the audience to scream “5,4,3,2,1”.

Andi comes out, she is sparkly. 
The guys start asking questions and Andi deflects them well. Cody gets to ask a question and I miss all of it because I cannot stop trying to process his hair and his Canadian tuxedo, I wonder if FC’s girl brought it with her from Toronto. cody-makeup
Marquel, Andi yells “my cookie monster” and we find out that she did not see him as a romantic interest...the trend on this show continues (see my first few recaps of this season).

Chris asks Andi about the internet rumor that she is pregnant, she laughs it off and says it is false. He then brings up the fact that he has the results from the lie detector test - Chris, Brian and JJ were all the way honest; Marcus, Dillon and Josh all lied. Marcus said he has slept with fewer than 20 women (shocked faces in Audience) that was a lie. Dillon lied about preferring brunettes and being ready for marriage. Chris leaves it up to Andi as to whether she wants to hear what lies Josh told, Dillon and Brian tell her not to hear them...she complies, annoying the world.

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Cali-J ueber alles in der Welt. Some think that I am mean; (I call them friends), in fact I am not that mean. What I am is sarcastic and dry to the sandpaper level. I have friends that I have never said a kind word to their face, but I praise to the ends of the earth to anyone I know and will defend them to the end. That’s just how I roll! My boys know that I am down for them, my girls know that no matter what I will keep them safe (and occasionally flirt with them [If you are a female friend of mine and think I haven’t flirted with you it just means you didn’t notice, it was extremely subtle or…not yet ]). No one is safe from my sarcasm even my own parents; hence of course as a kid I spent a significant amount of time in punishment. I treat people with respect if I think they deserve it – everyone starts off with the same amount of respect from me (a lot). You don’t need to earn my respect; you have to keep my respect.