Infrequently updated consistently funny

Thursday, May 26, 2011



I know to my American friends that means little but to a bona fide yardie like me that means a tonne!
 - If you have Netflix watch it, damn it watch it!

My pops and I had an emotional and important conversation and it lasted almost 3 times as long as our usual 5 minutes 36 seconds. 

I think I saw one of my law school nemeses at the gym: Looks just like him same goofy smile same blank stare. Not good to have bottled up enemies or resentment - nearly dropped weights on my chest while benching and thinking that it was him, really had a scary moment there. Can never forget a Florence night club incident with that kid.
- The bonus is, I do not have many/or any enemies really, even that kid was just someone who annoyed me more than I hated them...cannot really think of anyone I truly hate.

The  T-mobile ad with the young kid rapping cracks me up. Partly because the kid is getting a tonne of love and I suspect part of that is due to his  skin colour and the speed of his lyrics but mainly because I love how hard the T-mobile girl is trying to dance and look cool at the same time. I cannot see the ad without laughing!

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Cali-J ueber alles in der Welt. Some think that I am mean; (I call them friends), in fact I am not that mean. What I am is sarcastic and dry to the sandpaper level. I have friends that I have never said a kind word to their face, but I praise to the ends of the earth to anyone I know and will defend them to the end. That’s just how I roll! My boys know that I am down for them, my girls know that no matter what I will keep them safe (and occasionally flirt with them [If you are a female friend of mine and think I haven’t flirted with you it just means you didn’t notice, it was extremely subtle or…not yet ]). No one is safe from my sarcasm even my own parents; hence of course as a kid I spent a significant amount of time in punishment. I treat people with respect if I think they deserve it – everyone starts off with the same amount of respect from me (a lot). You don’t need to earn my respect; you have to keep my respect.