Making Pasta this week and explaining my lack of fancy...

I have previously expounded on my lack of cheese sophistication in other posts but since it has been months since I posted anything, allow me an indulgence...

Once upon a time I was a little boy in the greatest country ever created; Jamaica from the Arawak word Xaymaca meaning Land of Wood and Water, we were an agrarian and Tourist based economy so fancy cheeses were unknown. So unknown that for many a year I thought that only 3 (2.5 if you look closely) cheeses existed – they were Cheddar (White or Yellow) and Pizza Cheese (which I learned was mozzarella if of quality but really is more often this guy http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pizza_cheese [btw that is disgusting and makes me want to reconsider pizza]) and that was it.


Then I came to the Home of the Brave and the Land of the Free (economy) and realized that there are a tonne of cheeses available I mean seriously you guys have CHEESE shops, shops dedicated to just cheese! You go out to restaurants and order 'cheese boards'. Really CHEESE BOARDS? That is considered a meal, I am still amazed. You quite literally can run the gamut from A to Z in Cheeses, American, Asiago and Anari to Ziger, Zumelle and Zuvi. Well this Thursday I am making pasta and I am making it the way all good Jamaicans make it WITH CHEDDAR as the main cheese. A slight concession to my years in America is that I will make a 4-cheese pasta sauce to add to it (I have become Americanized and soft) but the main cheese will be a good hearty Cheddar grated by hand with the wrong grater setting like a real yard man (Jamaican living outside of the homeland).

Hostage at Sangster Airport in JAMAICA!!!!

Go Jamaica :: Hostage at Sangster Airport :: News

Yes I put Jamaica in Caps because I would never have believed this could happen. Bit ironic that this has happened just a few weeks after this video was all the rage on the net...

Really funny Mavado video!

The video is mildly safe for work but the audio is NOT!!!
Trust me the video starts off slow (almost painfully so) but the end is worth the first 20 seconds...oh man is it worth it. Cannot tell you more, cause I do not want to spoil it for you

Have fun

Jamaica parliamentarian says GAYS SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO CARRY GUNS!...Father forgive my land

I AM ASHAMED TO BE JAMAICAN RIGHT AT THIS INSTANCE. Look, I constantly make fun of America so I would be less of a man if I could not shine a light on a member of my parliament making a fool of himself and his country...and getting other idiots to agree with him (listen to the peeps in the background showing assent and the Prime Minister sitting there serenely listening to him - Fire fi dem all)



Unuu should be ashamed of unnuu self. I have been told that you are a lawyer so great...I AM ASHAMED TO BE A LAWYER RIGHT AT THIS INSTANCE. Where is the reasoned discussion that is supposed to come with our profession? Where is the reasoned elaboration from examining existing arrangements?

Do you even realize that you are saying gays are less than human? Do you realize that you want to treat 'the gays' like the British used to treat us? We could fight their wars, scrub their floors, but we could never be them! My mom has said the educated people of our country will all scorn your statement but many will not say anything publicly for fear of being branded gay. Well fie on that, I will brand YOU publicly, you are disgusting, and the culture of fear that you are promoting by such speeches sitting in the seat of our government is the same reason why others will not speak out.

Our crime rate is at record levels, our economy is SUFFERING, the US dollar weakened and instead of ours gaining on it, it is moving to $90 J.A. to $1 U.S. and the big things you have to talk about are Homosexuals and Daggerin' songs? What the hell are unnuu in power to do?

Maybe they are arming themselves because some people get up in Parliament and make statements against them. Maybe because as a culture we claim to be God fearing peaceful and forgiving but then beat homosexuals or men (merely) accused of being homosexuals.

The claim that the Jamaica Constabulary Force has a large number of gays ("overrun" in your words)... So? When a thief comes into your house at night is your first thought, "I hope the policeman that shows up is not gay?" or is it "Father protect me and send help NOW!" Cause mine is the latter, I am a straight man, but if a gay policeman is the person that saves my life best believe I am hugging him! What you afraid that merely touching a gay person will make you gay too? Remember, plenty of your friends are probably on the Peter King tapes...you might be too!
(a quick aside, how comes nobody can get to see those tapes? I find that very suspicious)
I want to see your stats: How many are in the J.C.F.? (not that it matters if one policeman is gay or all are, I just want to see these numbers that you so blatantly throw out)

Furthermore, you are concerned that gays are forming organizations? Really, after you just took them to task in parliament? You are lucky the only thing they are forming is peaceful organizations, after the way you just treated them, they probably should be forming militias.

When the Prime Minister said on the British Program that we will not bow to international pressure re our laws concerning gays, I applauded his stance, because I took a nationalist view. While I feel many of our laws concerning homosexuality should be changed, I do not believe any country has the right to come tell us what to do (you hear me Britain, take your Governor General and your requirement that Jamaicans, members of the bloody commonwealth have to get VISAS and go drop it inna di Queen lap). But, to say that normal (and yes gays are normal people) law abiding citizens in a country that has one of the WORST crime rates in the world, should be deprived of the right to defend themselves merely because they do not like the same things that you and I do is asinine. You sir are an ASS!

Any long time reader of the blog knows my hesitance on calling for peeps jobs (I prefer to fine and suspend most times) but here sir, you need to be removed from your post. I doubt it will ever happen but I truly wish it would.

"Come and feel the spirit,[one love, one heart] , the spirit of Jamaica, lets get together it's gonna feel all right [one love, one heart]" that is the ad used to lure tourists to Jamaica...make sure you add at the end in the fine print disclaimers like medical adverts, "...but not if you are gay, maybe gay, act like you are gay and belong to any gay supportive organizations. If you carry a licensed fire arm but happen to be gay, Jamaica may not be right for you. Known side effects are a feeling that you do not belong, that your safety is compromised and you are less than equal. If you match any of these symptoms ask your travel agent if you display any outward symptoms of gayness, if not...have a nice trip"

When grown men cry...vol 3.5336

I am not the crying type, do not do it at funerals, do not do it at weddings, sad movies anything. My bro does not shed tears either, and nor does the other male companion at the dinner. Forgive my sexism here for not listing the women but the post is titled "when grown men cry".

I made some jerk seasoning last night, the flavor was amazing but "oh my goodness, oh no, oh no oh no"...those are words that were echoed all night as tears poured from eyes as sweat sprung from my brow. My heart literally felt like it stopped (I think it might have). My bro had to walk outside into the cold air, our friend started gasping and doubled over in pain, and I, the Cali Jamaican, the man who created the meal, ran to the refrigerator poured a tall glass of milk and started gargling with it. I had made the spiciest jerk chicken and shrimp meal I have ever made in my life.

The pepper literally had me screaming, thank goodness we were out in the woods of Malibu. I have never experienced heat like that. It gave me instant hiccups and I could not stop the eyes from 'bleeding'.

The craziest part is that Sarah sat serenely across from us just staring at us as if nothing was wrong. I thought I was 2 steps away from death, and Sarah was in Oliver Twist mode "please sir can I have some more".

We killed a couple bottles of wine, a whole bottle of vodka, almost half a container of soy milk and tonnes of cups of water and I still feel as if my body is on fire. It is now 24 hours later and I am still haunted by the fire of it. The best part is, it tasted so damn good that we kept eating the food, even though we were suffering.

On a brighter or should it be lighter note, my scallops were judged "perfect" I was so damn happy. I always find scallops so damn challenging to make, they are so finicky. But I broiled them with some sea salt, garlic, ginger, sugar, olive oil and fresh cracked pepper and they just seemed to take the 'perfect' level of flavor.

Usain Bolt, Shelly-Ann Frazer, doing it clean, ask other countries why they can no longer win!

"That girl, that girl Shelly-Ann" I love the sheer joy that she showed after winning the 100m, I could not stop chuckling. I love the exuberance of our winners, now the haters are coming out of the woodwork saying they lack class because of the celebrations - STUFF IT! I remember Carl Lewis sticking his hand in the air every time he passed his competitors and thought he had the win!

Rahtid I love the braces just gleaming in all the pictures and love how happy both Fraser and Bolt were in their interviews.

(Nuh linger)

Ok so let us talk serious talk fi a minute cause is bout time wi address the fact that my country is finally getting its props in sprinting. Is ages now we thought we had some of the best sprinters and yet mysteriously the big countries with the extra cash and resources were always pulling things out.

As a commenter on espn wrote "every year at the penn relays our high school runners trash the americans yet when they get to the professional level these same american runners that were constantly being beaten at college and high level suddenly become unbeatable. why?:

We know why, but I refuse to just blame America because there were also runners from Europe that would suddenly develop muscle and start winning at the Olympics and World Champs but would lose to Jamaicans consistently in the regular grand prix events...cycling off?

My sentiments are shared by many as noted by another commenter on espn: "
JDH07504 (15 minutes ago)
Report Violation

The first clean Olympics since the Cold War and now JAMAICA has finally been given a chance to shine. In their first Olympics in 1948 Jamaica a tiny British Colony won The gold and silver in the men's 400m.

In 1952 The Country again won gold and silver in the men's 400m AND Won the mile relay in a new world record beating the United States. What drug programme did this little "backward" colony have in 1948? How did they manage to conquer the world in 1948 and beat the Great United States and their British Colonial Masters? They did it again in 1952"

The history of cheating by certain industrial nations is long and clear and contains amusing stories like; a certain female champ that could not make the 1984 finals, retired, took a job in banking, came back to track, suddenly set records like crazy and then died young under unusual circumstances while gaining incredible muscle over a short time.

I quote from an Smh.com.au article: "Olympic legend Carl Lewis is among more than 100 American athletes involved in a cover-up of drug use, documents reveal"

You could do research (and by research I mean 2 seconds on google) and see how many top athletes have been busted but for now I will just use the words of a commenter from espn responding with outrage to an American commenter suggesting that for Jamaicans to now be winning they must be doping:

"GATLIN, MARION JONES, MICHELLE COLLINS, JEROME YOUNG, PETTIGREW, TORRI EDWARDS, The twins who ran 400m alvin and calvin harrison, kelly white, dennis mitchell and many more. all PROVEN CHEATS. plus CARL LEWIS tested positive 3 times but it was covered up by ustfa."

That is a who's who of American names, hell Edwards just ran in the 200 (you might not know for sure since she ended up completely out of the photo finish pix) and many a Jamaican is still bitter about Marion Jones' robbing Ottey of GOLD!

The only guy who popped positive in our Trials grew up in America and lives in America and had no shot of posting a good time in the Olympics anyway...kind of points to why he might be on the juice. Note also the Jamaican federation took no chances with him and made him stay home!

And I am damn tired of this move: When a Jamaican running for Canada, Britain or America wins they are listed as the American champ, if they pop positive for anything they suddenly become "JAMAICAN BORN sprinter"...if you own them as champs own them as cheats, because we certainly do not shy away from our people!

Look I am not saying that other countries cannot win without steroids...I am just saying...JAMAICA TO DI WURL!

Kamau Graham's Funeral

is Saturday, July 12, 2008 at 10am at the UWI Chapel. Interment follows at Dovecot.
- -No floral tributes.

To all those located back home, who can go, please go and support the family and friends.
If one can say there is any good to come from a funeral, it is the fact that we can go and celebrate life by seeing many whom we have lost touch with. Go give someone a hug, or a pound or just a head knock, but just go!

Kamau was a member of the Campion College class of 1995 but he touched many more than just his classmates.

R.I.P. Kamau.

Thanks to Mario and Kamau F. for sending me the funeral details.
(Sorry I took so long to post I was out of town)

Norbrook Massive STAND UP! Rep your hood...and all sorts of slang that sounds funny coming from 'The brook'

Look, I acknowledge that Norbrook is filled with rich socialites and politicians. I acknowledge that much of the power of Jamaica is concentrated in the various Upper Saint Andrew districts. I humbly acknowledge that I was lucky to spend some of my formative years living in Norbrook (thanks to the Father above, and the Father on earth, we have been blessed).

And if there was ever any doubt that Norbrook considered itself upper-crust, and wanted to make sure it stayed that way, one would only have to look to the fact that the party 'Contagious' scheduled for Friday in Norbrook has been canceled: I now quote from this article on RJR's website

"Mayor of Kingston Desmond McKenzie said the decision followed numerous complaints from the police and residents who also filed a petition requesting that no further licences be granted for the staging of these dances and parties in the up-scale residential area."
---Sure anyone cared about the police requests.

"Mayor McKenzie said the KSAC will not be issuing any more licences for the staging of any such events in this area."
--Hahah a whole neighborhood has been purged of parties in one fell swoop...hmm sounds like some pressure was put upon the Mayor. I am sure it has nothing to do with the fact that in that same neighborhood there are peeps that dominate the radio waves (not even talking bout my own pops, he shares his grievances in private), or the fact that 2 former Prime ministers have homes there. Nothing to do with the heads of 3 banks living on the main road. And nothing to do with the fact that almost every house there has a minimum of 2 cars and if only 2 are present one must be a luxury vehicle! Hell, my neighbor is an Ambassador, 3 doors down is a High Commissioner, and 2 blocks down is his mistress!

I hate to say it, and I am pretty sure it has a lot to do with my breeding and where I grew up, (the Golden Triangle, then 'The Brook') but a few years ago I went back home and there was a party in the 'hood and I was shocked to see 'certain persons' walking through the area: Now note, I did not judge these persons, I was actually attending the very same party, but I was shocked because I remember a time when peeps would call the police to chase 'undesirables' out of the neighborhood.

It is honestly funny to me the power and cockiness of the Norbrook neighborhood, a neighborhood that I knew NOTHING about until the moment my parents decided to go house shopping when I was a kid...shows just how little I cared back then (and now, though now u have to say it to believe it) about power and privilege. I had no idea that to own a house in Norbrook was supposed to be a rich thing---even now I still doubt it, but this article makes it harder to swallow.

Imagine a whole suburban area here in America saying "we are too good to have parties here, do it in another area", because believe me, that is exactly what happened.

To close, I remember chuckling once when a neighbor ranted to me about parties and "people who live in apartments" moving into Norbrook: "That shit might be fine in ghettos like Cherry Gardens but this is Norbrook". I almost choked on my Red Stripe to hear this man call Cherry Gardens ghetto. For my San Diego friends, Cherry Gardens would be like La Jolla...nothing to sneeze at!

Yup (soon to be ex-wife), this is what you have to look forward to when we visit

Of Jamaican bomb makers and Music you should get...Estelle

Ok so I have to admit that when I first heard that a Jamaican had been held in an Orlando airport my first thought was "wow he must have had a tonne of drugs for this to make the news." Then I heard he had explosive material with him and I thought, "they must have gotten this wrong, no way a Jamaican tried to get on a plane with bombs". Then I found out it was explosive material, not put together and realized, it was probably much ado about nothing. BUT, in this post 9/11 world it is had to brush off any incident. Clearly this poor guy is messed up, The Jamaica Gleaners story about him, makes me realize there is no way this guy was going to hold it together much longer.

I am pretty certain that I am more sympathetic to him because he is Jamaican. I also think some of it has to do with the fact that he is flying with a beard that looked alot like the beard I flew up with. Plus, I am convinced through my non-scientific, scientific poll of just the people and stories I know, that going into the military and going to Iraq, completely messes with your brain.

I am also somewhat inclined to believe his story that he planned to blow stuff up in Jamaica and show his friends how to blow things up...my fear is WHAT HE PLANNED TO BLOW UP!

You should cop the Estelle album 'Shine' I am a big fan of hers. I am telling you to get the album even though I have only heard about 5 songs of hers. Look I have never steered you wrong on the blog. I know my music. While I listen to a lot of junk, my recommendations are always good. You will not regret getting her album. When I finish listening to it, I will tell you more, but her stuff is good. I would have gotten through more but I keep listening to the same songs over and over again.