Bachelorette recap or How to turn a death into a positive ratings grab.

My friend and I just took advantage of TGIF’s new all you can eat Appetizers, it was my first time in a TGIF in 6 years, we drank a tonne we ate a tonne and it will probably be another 6 years before I am hungry again.

Hometown dates:

Nick in Wisconsin is first:

Andi meets Nick in the Milwaukee public market. Nick calls it his favorite place in the city. Nick clearly has the bar put a new tap on with Nick and Andi beer “the Perfect brew”. It is probably sour.

Andi asks “what is a polka?” AGAIN...how is she an attorney?

They finally meet Nick’s family...he has 10 siblings it is like so many stereotypes I have heard of Wisconsin. 

Nick’s dad pulls Andi aside but we never see the conversation. Instead we see the conversation with Andi and Nick’s closest sibling who brings up that Nick has had his heart broken before.

Andi also gets questioned by Nick’s 9 year old little sister Bella and Andi tries to explain what a “mental connection” is to her - run little girl, do not get dating advice from this woman. Nick then grills Bella for her questions and Andi’s answers (methinks he gave her the questions) she tells him that Andi really likes him. I find the age gap between Nick and his sister a bit strange, he is 33...I have a huge age gap in my family but this seems extraordinary especially since Nick does not seem like he is the oldest. My ex teases me constantly about the age difference between my brother and I, she hates me, but her mom is hot.

Nick gives a very creepy stare into the camera and says “I will never get enough Andi, I just want it to be us”. Nick does not tell her he loves her.

We go to Arlington, Iowa:

It is Chris’ hometown date and we get the obligatory shot of him walking alone in a huge field. Chris has a house and this impresses Andi, she keeps missing his hints that maybe the family paid for it he uses “ours” and “we” alot when talking about the home and property.

They take a tractor out into the field and Chris lets Andi drive, she pretends to panic like there could ever be an accident while they are out in acres and acres of property. 

Andi pretends that she could be happy in Iowa, Chris thinks Andi is excited about Iowa...Chris is wrong. Chris tells Andi that she could be a homemaker, she is less than pleased. He has a plane fly by with a banner ‘Chris loves Andi’, 

I know it is supposed to be cute but I get the feeling that life with Chris is filled with kitschy stuff that would just drive me nuts.

Chris' mom asks Chris if Andi could live in Iowa...it is not a good sign that everyone knows this could be a concern. Andi is NOT I repeat NOT moving to Iowa - She while talking to Nick’s mom says “I love my career” and we have to wonder “What career?”, reality TV? Because clearly she is not trying to be an attorney. Chris’ mom is very sweet. Daggum it.

To end the night they play “Ghost in the graveyard” and of course Andi finds Chris (they make out) because hey this is not scripted.

Tampa Florida:

Josh’s hometown:

Josh takes her to a baseball field and claims that it is tough for him to take anyone there that might be true, if I tried hard to make a team and it did not work out that might crush me. 

He throws Andi some soft pitches and she crushes them, she even breaks a bat...

I keep staring at her shorts.

Josh makes it seem that he chose to give up baseball, not the other way around. He is now focused on his brother Aaron Murray (I am surprised that it took me this long to make the connection - I liked his brother in college) former QB at Georgia the kid was tough and good.

Apparently Josh is in love with his dog Sable. Aaron leads the toast at the table (and looks directly into the camera) Andi appears to be very jealous of the attention that Aaron is receiving. Josh’s sister tells Andi that she and Josh might fight over Andi’s desire to separate him from the family.

They play a game of backyard football, since I know he has been safely drafted I chuckle at the thought of Aaron getting injured in this game and having to explain this to teams.

Dallas Texas:

Marcus’ hometown:

He picks Andi up and this feels like it was done just to show off his Mercedes.  

He takes her to a club that is so blatantly a set up and yup he reenacts his stripping from the first group date he was on...

his dancing is terrible - but Andi is intrigued.

All of these hometown dates have been terrible.

Andi meets Marcus’ family and his niece presents them with bracelets, all these kids tonight have been so much more confident than I ever was as a kid. I do wonder if social media and the openness of information makes kids less concerned about cameras and strangers in their home nowadays...or maybe I was just a wuss.

Marcus’ sister does him no favors and makes him sound like he is clingy. Marcus starts crying when talking to his brother about their dad leaving and his brother being a father figure and yup his sister is right - he is very sensitive.  

All of these dates seem very truncated and I suspect there was some editing done to get them down to a small size so that more time could be spent on the death of Eric, or maybe they were the usual length and I did not notice it because I am digesting 18lbs of chicken wings.

We go to Chris Harrison’s home in Los Angeles, CA:

No really we are at Chris’ home...and of course his home is laid out like a Bachelor/Bachelorette set - All the guys able to sit facing the camera. And arrives and everyone looks nervous, Chris proceeds to tell them that Eric has died. The room goes appropriately quiet. Marcus walks outside, Andi follows him and they sit on the porch with Marcus’ arm around her (grief can be sexy?). The production crew comes in and starts to hug Andi and the guys, the camera is perfectly placed to capture the reactions - I know that I am very cynical in this blog, but as someone who has worked with people in film I can vouch for them that even in moments of genuine emotion/grief on their part, they would still be professional enough like this group to keep filming.

BUT...this whole moment feels gross and unnecessary, we already knew that Eric had died, it was impressed upon us the very first night of this show, it was rehashed the night he left we did not need to see this, we did not need to know how they reacted, it felt staged and it felt forced.

Andi and Chris sit down for their fireside chat, and Andi cries alot about the responsibility she now bears, yes Andi has made Eric’s death about her.

Nick busts out a gorgeously cocky pastel jacket...that is the jacket you wear when you think you are winning the show. 
I also love that he is clearly not wearing an “I came to mourn jacket”. Andi picks up the first rose, holds it like a chalice, pauses and then says “I am sorry” and walks off crying; I want to believe it is genuine.

Josh gets the first rose when Andi returns...have to fulfill that contract. Chris gets the 2nd rose and I am surprised. Nick gets the final rose and there is no surprise there. Once Chris got the rose Marcus was done for. Andi tells Marcus he did everything right...oh really?

Inviting a girl 1 month of the plane from France to Cinco de Mayo...not the easiest thing

I received horrible news today, not news that is of immediate personal impact to me, but horrible because of the immediate pain it causes someone I love. Any long time reader (or close enough friend of mine) knows that death rarely affects me personally, what affects me is seeing the pain it causes to those around me [quick side step; when my Grandfather passed in Tobago my dad and I went, I was very young, but I felt no emotional pain, shed no tears until I saw how sad my Dad was and then I broke down, not for my Grand, but for my Dad.] It is much the same here I saw that my friend was in pain (saw it from afar) and it troubled me, troubled me enough that on a night I had not planned to drink at all, I drank.

But this is not a morbid blog, in fact this is the rare double blog in a 24 hour period. And I will try desperately to not give a virtual middle finger to Eli and Vivian for making me drive for 40 minutes each way and standing me up. Even though in the back of my head I had the above worries (tried to call before heading out because I was afraid of trying to answer the phone later, I would definitely have answered but would not have wanted any crazy yelling in the back ground) I had a fairly decent night. Let us do a brief recap

Finally heard the Charlie Sheen remix to the Duck Sauce's 'Barbara Streisand' hahah basically just replace her name with 'winning' and 'Charlie Sheen'. Since I have a tonne of work to do I think I will just stay up all night and work all night, and thus get to sleep in a bit (you had to know there was some trigger for the double blog).

So in regards to the title, I invited a French girl I met over the weekend out tonight, but trying to explain to her in my super limited French (yes I was trying to impress) was too much of a chore so I just ended the explanation with..."people go out and drink a tonne". I cannot wait to invite my Korean friend out for Bastille Day. Turns out she did come out, but she was at another bar and by the time we decided to walk past the spot there was too long a line and there was a Dart Bet to settle with Yau...more on that later

This is not Ego but science talking; I think I could write a 'club banger'. The elements seem basic, get a track with a HEAVY bass line, add a simplistic hook, put in some lines stating how much swagger, girls, jewels, power or money I have and this is key at some point raise my voice an octave.

There is nothing like seeing a girl dance for you, my boy was interested in the 'darker' of 2 girls and while he kept trying to catch her eye I was staring at her and her friend, (basically I had a lot running through my head and they just happened to be in my eyeline plus I knew my boy was interested in one). Every time the 'lighter' one locked eyes with me she would do a little swivel of the hips dance and mimic sliding down the pole ('move your body like a snake ma') I wish I was not so shy, this is what is known in the trade as 'on a platter'.

Towards the end of the night I said something I regret, not because I was mean or aggressive or anything but because I accidentally embarrassed someone and I did not mean to I was genuinely trying to help: As I was walking to the W.C. this guy walking past me had something slip from his pocket so I immediately said "hey man you dropped your lipstick" because he dropped it. He immediately looked at me angrily and said "that is not mine and it's not lipstick" so I walked on but I made sure on the way out to stop and look at the item and it was definitely lipstick. So now I wonder if he was ashamed of it, I clearly saw it fall from his pocket - maybe he was carrying it for his girl, maybe it was his (though he did not have any on and did not look like the type to wear), or and this one I hope is not true, he robbed some poor girls purse and just shoved everything in the purse in his pockets with plans to sift through later. No matter what it was, the reaction seemed . weird and I truly just wanted to help.

Finally, DARTS. You have to love the competitive nature of guys. Yau and I talked smack to each other about dart skills ignoring the fact that neither of us had ever seen each other play and of course even though it was late and post bar and we both have work in the morning we had to play a game of darts...he won the first which immediately necessitated a rematch which I won..."take that with you". So now Yau, we are 1-1 and that game you won was the last you will ever win against me!


Bless...

R.I.P. Cousin Azeez

(This is a very late post. I had it just sitting in my saved box for ever because I just had a hard time posting it)

My cousin died due to his car plunging into a canal in Florida and he was submerged under water for 20 minutes. I cannot explain the sorrow I felt when I heard the news. It was just so shocking to deal with and to believe that a man who was so vibrant was just gone like that. But the thing that hit me hardest was that he left my cousin and her 2 kids. I just felt such a sense of loss when I thought about what his loss meant to their immediate family.

It is weird that I rarely feel much pain when death occurs. But this one hit me hard because of I guess the family connection and I just cannot get over how it occurred and what was left undone.

I do not want to go into too much detail the news does a decent job on it here

Just reading the words "oldest child, 21-year-old Javeed." makes it hard to stomach...I think especially because I remember when Javeed could be held by me in one hand while holding my other cousin Andre in the other

I will miss him and my heart goes out to mi familia

Thank you for Being a Friend, R.I.P. Bea

Bea Arthur died today.

I love Bea Arthur, in fact I loved the Golden Girls. Many guys act like they cannot say something like that, but sensible people know that, that show was a great slice of Americana. The ensemble cast was brilliant and Bea was a shining star in the midst of all that talent.

She along with the others brought an empowered female cast to television and showed that women could be 'sexy' without having to flaunt their sexuality.

I will miss you Bea

Oakland Seethes Over Police Shooting

Oakland Seethes Over Police Shooting

Whew what a way to return to blogging, I was going to make my first blog of the new year my rant against my mistreatment by Air Jamaica ( I will still get to that) but this is more important.

Strange to me that you never seem to hear about 'accidental' shootings of white men. The accompanying videos are graphic, and even for those desensitized by video game violence you might have a 'gasp moment'

As noted by Shehryar (thanks for letting me know the updates) if there had not been video for this, it might have been just "another average story no one hears about"

I do not know why the cop found it necessary to draw a piece, (some say he thought it was a Tazer, I thought he might have drawn the gun to intimidate) what I do know is that once you draw a weapon of any sort you better be damn careful with it...he was not!

http://cbs5.com/video/?id=44043@kpix.dayport.com
The link shows the video from one angle. They seemed to have the guy under control, there does not seem to be a reason for the gun/taser (if he thought he was pulling that).

Let me address the Taser v Gun thing...Do you not know the difference between a gun and a Taser? Do they not have different handles, look, feel and Safeties?

I thought that cops were supposed to be more and more reluctant to reach for Tasers? And are you supposed to Taser someone who is face down with another cops knee on their neck?



A 22 year old man, face down shot in the back, sounds like a damn execution...if one did not know that the cops were involved you would think it were a gang style killing!

Note that one of the persons who took the video wants to remain anonymous...think he fears reprisals from the cops?

R.I.P. Paul Newman

One of the first movies I loved as a kid was "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" he really was 'just cool'

In later years I have thought of him more for his charitable foundations and Salad Dressing, but he always seemed cool in my head.

Unfortunately there goes another Hollywood legend.

'Poor out a little sauce for you today'

R.I.P. Gene Upshaw and the IOC president tongue lashes Bolt

I did not always agree with you, but you did much for the game that I love to watch for about 22 weekends of the year.


IOC president Jacques Rogge, do not mek mi tell yuh bout yuh rass!

Look, the guy is 22, if you have a problem with how he is celebrating, talk to him in private, no need to censor him in public. I did not see you calling out the Russian pole vaulter who was doing back flips, I did not hear you say anything when the US swimming team started screaming at the French. I read nothing about you going after the Chinese team doing laps in the arena...so stuff it!

"If a Fassy hole nuh like wi suck yuh mumma
cau no missa body bad man nuh fraida
mi tell any missa man fi guh suck out him gal
cau bad man nuh itch fi guh blow petrol " --Cham

R.I.P. Bernie Mac, R.I.P. Isaac Hayes

Bernard Jeffrey McCullough (October 5, 1957 – August 9, 2008)

Man I will miss Bernie Mac, he was one funny "mother (shut yo mouth)"
The man was an artist with the use of the word motherfu@$er, he used it like a samurai used a blade, and to prove my point, watch the video.



And if you disagree, I will "bust yo head to the white meat"

Isaac Lee Hayes, Jr. (August 20, 1942 – August 10, 2008)
Peeps prolly just think of him as the theme song to Shaft and the voice of Chef, but really he meant so much more to soul music.

And if you disagree, "Suck on my chocolate salty balls" and take the "SHAFT...damn right"

If I were Samuel L. Jackson, and a suspicious man, I would be careful, very careful for the next 3 days if you believe 'death comes in threes' to explain let me add this from Hayes' wiki page:

"During the spring of 2008, Hayes shot scenes for a comedy about soul musicians inspired by the history of Stax Records entitled Soul Men, in which he will appear as himself in a supporting role. Soul Men stars Samuel L. Jackson and Bernie Mac, who coincidentally would die the day before Hayes in August 2008. [23] The film is scheduled for release in November 2008"

"Braves Win! Braves Win!"...no longer: R.I.P. Skip Caray

The longtime voice of the Atlanta Braves (my favorite baseball team) and the person that helped me learn to understand and love baseball, has died. Skip Caray (son to Harry) died today. While he had been ill for the past few years, I do not think peeps expected him to die so suddenly.

If you watched baseball on TBS, growing up, his voice is extremely familiar to you, and if you were/are a Braves fan, hearing this "Braves Win! Braves Win!" coming from Skip was always awesome.

TBS sadly no longer broadcasts Braves' games on a regular basis which I find extremely sad since millions of kids will not be indoctrinated to the joy that is the team of the ATL and join the cult of 'America's team'. I will miss hearing Skip's voice, he made Baseball extremely fun for me and made it come alive to a young boy who would stay up all hours of the night to listen to West Indies cricket on the radio.

I would watch baseball till 9.30 or so, sometimes later if my parents would let me, then I would go of to my room and secretly stay up half the night listening to the Windies beat up on some poor team silly enough to play us in Test cricket...those were the days...the Braves dominated the NL east, and the Windies could not lose...I miss Viv Richards as captain.

Kamau Graham's Funeral

is Saturday, July 12, 2008 at 10am at the UWI Chapel. Interment follows at Dovecot.
- -No floral tributes.

To all those located back home, who can go, please go and support the family and friends.
If one can say there is any good to come from a funeral, it is the fact that we can go and celebrate life by seeing many whom we have lost touch with. Go give someone a hug, or a pound or just a head knock, but just go!

Kamau was a member of the Campion College class of 1995 but he touched many more than just his classmates.

R.I.P. Kamau.

Thanks to Mario and Kamau F. for sending me the funeral details.
(Sorry I took so long to post I was out of town)