Clayton live is not a Clayton we care for

 Awe rats. This is a 'live' show, immediately upon seeing that I skipped past the audience moments - We return to Reykjavik and Clayton is in a church by himself as a choir sings (he ended last episode telling us that his faith is important) while Clayton tells us "I need somebody to help me BECAUSE I AM SO BROKEN" (we saw this 387 times in season previews). The choir clearly brought in just to sing to/for Clayton is a weird vibe. 

Clayton and Jesse have a sit down on a bench as Clayton recaps the night before with Susie leaving and how he feels. 

Now remember the remaining ladies do not know they are the 'remaining ladies' so we get Rachel telling us that she is nervous going into the rose ceremony. 

ROSE (Farce) CEREMONY:
Clayton showing the power of the producers decides he needs to tell 2 grown women that he was in love with the women and the woman who left. He then airs their business in front of each other (and millions around the world) and tells them that he was intimate with both of them. 

Rachel and Gabby both walk away to shed tears in Rachel's case super loud tears that I wonder if they are audio enhanced, because those sounds are the definition of 'wailing.' My closed caption lists Rachel's tears as "Cries echoing." Rachel is shook that Clayton thought he should tell them that he is still in love with Susie, I am shook by the stupidity it is an unnecessary L to take. 

Gabby while talking to a producer wonders "maybe it would be easier if I just go" while Clayton is talking to his older brother from another mother Jesse Palmer Gabby walks past them without looking. Clayton tells Jesse he wants to continue with both of them. 
Gabby returns and has adopted the Rachel-whisper "this is like so much." Gabby asks Clayton "what happened last night maybe hearing it will help me to understand" Clayton tells her he told Susie he loved her and she did not want to hear it because he had been intimate with the others and told them he loved them. Clayton then begins to tell Gabby he tried to explain to Susie that Fantasy Suite week is about intimacy and Gabby says "I don't need to hear everything." Clayton wants to keep explaining that he thought he should tell the ladies everything then Gabby asks the question all real Gs would ask - "It is hard to hear, like why wouldn't you just save it?"

Gabby to the camera "I don't want to be loved the most, I just want to be loved for who I am." 

Rachel's turn for her run of trademark #WhisperCry she says to "how do you even say this out loud?" re Clayton telling 

Fantasy Suites or like is it over like over like over over?

 The show takes off to Iceland and they really want you to know they took off since they force in a commercial for IcelandAir and Hilton Reykjavik while Clayton gives us narration that he thinks "I am falling in love with all three women and I am already in love with Susie...I am so excited." Clayton's narration ends with the women on a forced couch of destiny in a hotel room. 

Rachel gets the first one on one, Gabby "I am happy for you" Susie "Me too" Gabby "It will be nice." After Rachel leaves Susie voices "if tonight goes well they will be having intimate time with each other" in her ITM "Sex is something that I only do with people I have some form of commitment with...this week feels impossible and I don't know how to get through this." 

RACHEL: 

The helicopter budget kicks in

and the couple flies up to a volcano and then descend 400 feet inside of the volcano via a creaky lift (though I do not put it past the show to have added the creaking sounds). Back to the hotel and Gabby is saying she is okay with Clayton exploring multiple relationships and Susie is stressing that he might.

 

Dinner: 

Before it Rachel tells us that she does not think she will be able to go to the fantasy suite if Clayton does not express his feelings to her. Clayton haltingly says "I will just come out and say it, I am falling in love with you." Rachel is happy to accept the fantasy suite offer while we cut to Susie telling us that if Clayton sleeps with another woman "I would have a really hard time moving forward" she knows what show she is on right? 

Morning after: 

And the tell tale clothes on the floor and, Rachel is still whispering in a staged moment in bed wearing a robe and makeup "it is absolutely perfect waking up next to you" as a camera is tight on her face. The couple pretends to make breakfast. Rachel "intimacy is really important...and that is all I am going to say." As Clayton leaves Rachel shocks everyone by showing she can yell "I love you" "I love you too Rachel." 

Rachel is returned to the other girls and she states the obvious "it is really awkward...it is going to be a tough week for all of us having to see each other come home [hotel]." I dislike this format the show has adopted the last few seasons of having the final 3 all room together or at least having them bundled together for recaps; at this stage I do not need to see any of them 'broken' but the show wants that. 

GABBY:

Gabby is down, "I am so excited to have my one on one with Clayton and get some intimate time." Gabby is dropped off on a tundra

and as she is freezing and looking around for Clayton he comes up on a dune buggy for them to roam around. Gabby finally asks the question I never hear enough of when people are on a driving date with the lead "Do I get to drive?" and she enjoys her time at the wheel, she thought Clayton was a maniac on the wheel.

The couple goes to what looks like a working restaurant, could they not afford the buyout?

While Clayton is talking you can see a woman over his shoulder having a conversation with someone else, I half expect her to be an extra who interrupts and offers to teach the couple how to dance. 

The couple speaks about opening up and dropping walls. 

Dinner:

Gabby wants to hear that Clayton is falling in love with her...he tells her and earns kisses "She is just as excited to hear it as I am to say it." I know there is a strong push of 'GABBY FOR BACHELOR' but I cannot listen to her voice in extended periods for a whole season, I am just not built for it. 

They of course go to the fantasy suite

As Clayton and Gabby make out on the bed we cut back to Sad Susie. 

Morning after: 

The couple shares champagne and food in bed...something you can only do in hotel room beds in my life...YOU ARE NOT EATING IN MY BED...take that mess to the guest room. As Clayton walks away we get the yelling moment from the season trailer just with the name added in "Hey Gabby one more thing, I AM FALLING IN LOVE AND IT FEELS SO GOOD!" 

Gabby returns to the awkward couch of destiny and Susie says "She [sic] got bed head." 

Clayton realizes that now that he has told 2 women he is in love with them and thinks he is in love with a third "I am 1000% going to shatter someone" his math is not great. 

SUSIE:

The wind is so heavy Susie feels like she is being blown away, she tried to dress cute under her coat and the coat is being whipped,

Clayton tells her to do the run and jump and she cannot. 

The couple goes to a spa that does the "hot to cold, hot to cold" methods and I feel Susie's pain. I have done one of those before and I literally SCREAMED in one of the cold rooms, they had to physically hold me in the water (I gave them permission) because I was NOT going to willingly do it but I wanted to try the whole experience. 

Dinner:

Susie is breaking out a risque dress. Susie looks like a woman who is determined to break up with a man but let him know what he will be missing. As always Clayton takes forever but haltingly gets to "I was falling in love with you...I am in love with you. Susie does not appear to be happy at this reveal.

Susie does not react to Clayton's profession like the other women, she questions what he has said to the other women. Clayton admits that he has "to answer your questions yes I have slept with someone else here and yes, I've expressed feelings to someone else of falling in love." "BOTH" Susie is telling Clayton that she cannot move forward but Clayton asks a valid question if Susie knew she would have a problem with this why come so far and not warn Clayton about her rules?

Clayton storms out after Susie walks away from the table saying "this is exactly what I was afraid of...this invalidates everything." The producers work very hard they made sure to put Susie last they know what is up. 

Now that Clayton is ready to abandon and cry Jesse Palmer shows up, gotta earn that keep (THIS IS VERY SUSPICIOUS THAT JESSE HAPPENS TO BE AT A FANTASY SUITE pre-date). Clayton to Jesse "what up?" "You tell me" - Clayton then repeats "Why wouldn't she tell me? "She just completely destroyed me" "I know man, you told me from the beginning this is what you were afraid of" then Clayton some of this is on you for not asking the women in advance how they would react should you decide to be you know...intimate. Both sides can be wrong in a situation - Susie should have had the conversation to warn him about her rules and Clayton should have checked in if he had the fear - This is separate from Clayton's terrible reaction to the news, he failed himself here. 

Clayton tells Susie "you just invalidated everything I thought we had" then brings up how much her family said she was in love. Susie says "I know I am going home for sure now, you are committed to sending me home." Clayton "I apologize for raising my voice, this is out of character for me...but we are done...let me walk you out."

As Clayton walks away and walks to the car Susie is trailing behind him and saying the word "like" every 4th word as she is apologizing for how the situation went down. Interesting time for Clayton to throw his faith into the conversation. 

Blooper: 

Gabby tries to explain spelunking to Susie. 

Women Tell All and so does Genevieve's face.

 Jesse Palmer gets his first bit of heavy lifting as he tries his first 'Women Tell All' as a host and his first crack at saying "The most dramatic finale in Bachelor history." 

Shanae gets booed in the introduction segment . After the season recap package many of the women attack Shanae for her fakeness. Sierra dares Shanae to call the women bitches to their face not "behind a screen" Shanae does not. 

Sierra is in a very dramatic outfit and wearing some 'red bottoms.' After all she showed up night on in a DeLorean that for some reason the show edited out -night one but staying around until booted. 

Cassidy tries to convince us that she called the women bitches endearingly "MOVE BITCH" but with kindness. Cassidy takes a tack that her 'friends with benefit' was not someone important to her and she tries the positive casual sex route but the women shout that down saying the problem was not her desire for casual sex but the fact that she kept the guy as a backup plan. 

Kate says Cassidy's worst sin was to "coach Shanae and turn that bitch into Frankenstein" JUST A REMINDER IT WAS FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER! 

The women are not going to budge with Shanae as she walks up to the hot seat someone says "Her ass looks terrible" and Genevieve asks "are you wearing a diaper" "what is that outfit" sigh women who came off the show looking good may lose followers after tonight. 

Jesse is less of a host here and more of a conduit to allowing screaming. Shrill is too often a gendered term but if there was ever a time for it this is probably it. 

Elizabeth says she did not have a friendship with Shanae that could have decayed as Shanae claimed. 

Sierra has itemized receipts for Shanae. Yup shrill is the definite word here I just had to turn my volume down and the sound is still piercing. I think I am going to have to adjust the equalizer for this episode. Genevieve is getting heated and just as I type that she is invited up to the hot seat right beside Shanae7 - I highly doubt the show would risk this with 2 men. 

Shanae says that when she got sent home she lost weight stressing out but says when Genevieve went home "you f#@ked Aaron from Katie's season"  

this outrages the women as Genevieve denies the accusation saying she met Aaron at a bar "and never even kissed him." SAN DIEGO STAND UP! Shanae is given a chance for last thoughts and pauses then says "no, nothing."

Sarah is next up in the hot seat: After her recap video Sarah looks like she is going to cry (fake cry?). 

Mara is once again called upon to use the silly phrase "wife material" but Kate and Genevieve help her out. Sarah is asked about saying Clayton cried and she doesn't counter that statement she goes with the side step of "my intentions were not that." Asked directly "Did Clayton Cry?" Sarah initially says "I don't want to speak for him" then "Yes." 

Teddi's turn in the hot seat starts with her crying at her recap video: While Teddi is talking about her decision to wait on sex the camera does a weird linger on Lydnsey's face/Marlena's boobs and it was awkward. We find out that Clayton's brother slid into Teddi's DMs but she is not interested. 

Serene's time in the hot seat: Serene has borrowed some of Sierra's makeup palette and is wearing glitter on her eyes. Serene gets the type of calm interview that is often held for a woman that might be a potential bachelorette. 

CLAYTON:

"Time for Clayton to come out here and face the music" Clayton and Jesse hug and it looks like brothers embracing before family dinner. Clayton is wearing an ugly basic tie, his style this season has been...bleh. Jesse asks "what do you regret?" Clayton does not regret things but wishes he had done somethings differently. This is the opening Sierra wants and immediately asks why Clayton "chose to believe her over all of us" referring to Shanae. Clayton says "I wanted tangible evidence" "what is more tangible than the entire house?" Lyndsey does not want to hear Clayton's words "I wish you would say you had a better connection with her than the rest of us...own it like a man." Clayton says Shanae throwing the trophy away was a turning point but the ladies again call him out because he clearly kept Shanae after that moment. 

Clayton says that finding out that Sarah might have been playing him caused him to then start to question his relationship with other women on the show. Sarah tells Clayton that he stirred the pot. The moment that everyone wants to know about "did Clayton cry?" Clayton says he has no problem admitting to crying but he did not cry on "any of our dates" Sarah trying to still pretend says "I did not say he cried with me" it is not a solid look. 

Clayton coach speaks his way thanking the women for holding him accountable. 

Kira (who you might remember showed up in a lab coat and lingerie) shoots her shot at Clayton "I don't know if you are still single...I am single" 

BLOOPERS: Jesse is right, this is the moment we all wait for, some fun ones in this batch. 

We get a fun call back to when Jesse was the Bachelor and his infamous moment of calling the wrong woman's name and TAKING THE ROSE BACK! 

Wow as the show is close to wrapping up and leading to the promo for the season finale Sierra again calls out Clayton saying she is privy to knowledge about the ending due to the women all being friends "who are you to act a certain way and treat these women a certain way...and subject them to this behaviour of yours." This is unusual that the show leaves in women calling out the lead to such an extent and letting slip hints at the upcoming content. 

Final blooper: 

We find out that these women are not Zoologists (like me) and cannot identify an armadillo. 

Bachelor Recap or my hometown is outdoors.

 I absolutely do not miss Chris Harrison (OMCH) but there are moments when you remember him and one of those is Hometowns when he used to do the overdramatic intros to lead into the show. But admit it half the time you forget OMCH is no longer there...he played himself. 

Clayton looking like a walking brick of cream cheese tells us "today I am in Poquoson, Virginia to meet Susie's family."

SUSIE's HOMETOWN: 

Run and jump hug. 

"Today we are going to find out if Clayton likes being choked"

yeah blatant double entendre aside do not forget that Susie's intro package showed us her love of jujitsu. Susie's coach feels like a man very uncomfortable with being on camera. Clayton is taught the jujitsu move of 'shrimping' and the couple chuckles as they reminisce about Shanae and Shrimp-gate.

Susie terms herself Virginia-Sue. Susie shades her town "I guess I am like so different from my whole town" then like tells us a story that like has the word like, like a million times while she tells Clayton about her dad's illness "and like it is such a big deal to like meet him." 

The Family:

"I am going to meet her Mom Jean, Dad Tom, Sister Barbara and Her Best friend Lauren"? How did Lauren sneak into this? Did Lauren call in a chip? 

Susie and Tom go off to talk and Susie says he has set the bar high for men she is interested in. Tom tells Clayton that Susie is special and slept by his bed one night while he was sick. Tom talks up Susie and adds "you get her on the line you gotta reel her in" uhmm Dad your daughter has agency of her own LIKE come on man. 

Jean straight up asks Clayton "Do you love Susie?" Clayton equivocates and says "I will get there." 

Uhmm so I do not know who was sister Barbara vs best friend Lauren! 

GABBY's HOMETOWN:

Denver Colorado,  where we find out that Gabby was a 'Denver Bronco's cheerleader for 5 years." 

Run and jump hug. 

Gabby's plan is for the couple to go hiking Clayton tells us "everyone knows she is the funniest woman alive."

Their hike takes them to 'Proposal Rock' and Gabby lets Clayton know it is a strong hint.

Damn it, they go to a hot tub! I was debating picking Gabby for my team this week and hot tubs/swimsuits/kissing in water all give you extra points! 

Gabby tells Clayton that her dad will be unable to make it because his girlfriend was recently diagnosed with Cancer and with Covid protocols it is just not a risk they can take. 

Family: 

Clayton will be meeting "my grandpa John, and aunt Julie, Uncle Rich, cousin Keira" and Gabby's tears.

"I mean I am falling in love with Clayton." Gabby lets her family know about her Clayton pillow and her "sitting on your face" jokes. 

Gabby's granddad insists on calling her Gabriela and I love it "She's always been a dingbat, a loveable dingbat." In talking to Gabby granddad says "I think he is full of sh!t"

with a twinkle in his eye to laughter from Gabby, the show had used that line in promos for this week to try to make it seem like granddad said it in anger...I trust nothing this show does. As Gabby is saying she really wishes her dad could be there a car pulls up blowing its horn...I wonder who it could be.

It's Gabby's dad and he does a 'Love Actually' reenactment holding poster boards calling Gabby the "glue of the family."

In a completely unrealistic moment the rest of the family is wondering what is happening outside but does not walk out to check on her. 

Feels like we are racing through these first 2 hometowns so I suspect some drama is coming up in this episode. 

 SERENE's HOMETOWN:
Run and jump (and some wide swinging legs) 

Sadly Serene is from Oklahoma City, I hope she is not a sooner fan! 

Serene and Clayton do an aerial based obstacle course so of course Clayton is required to make a tortured metaphor about obstacle courses being like relationships.

I like Serene but if she made me do this we are DONE! She set this up without knowing if he had a fear of heights? To get back down you have to take "a leap of faith" and you are ratcheted down. 

Family: 

If you have historically watched this show you will not be shocked that Serene is the bi-racial product of a divorced family with a black dad and white mom. 

Appearing are Melanie, Serene's Bro Roland and the white mom. 

Roland takes Clayton aside to check in, he is worried that the "higher she gets" in the show's episodes "the harder she will fall" he knows a black woman aint 'winning' this. Roland asks Clayton "do you love her?" "To tell you the truth I haven't told anyone that, I am not there yet." 

Serene tells her mom that she is in love with Clayton. She also shows her mom the cheesy jar that lights up to rep fireflies she was given by Clayton. 

Serene's bro shares a tear with her and expresses concern but joy for her. 

Serene tells Clayton that "after today I am not falling in love with you, I am in love with you." Clayton says "it feels so good" he does not tell her her is falling in love with her. 

RACHEL's HOMETOWN: 

Clermont, Florida. A spin on the run and jump, Clayton tries it before Rachel jumps into his arms. 

Maybe this is why Rachel was always whispering she is losing her voice and I wonder if it was because she was forced to talk at a normal volume with non-Bach peeps for a few days. 

Rachel and Clayton take a Kayak down a river.

Is this the most outdoorsy hometown episode ever? The couple row to the kissing tree which requires Rachel to wrap around Clayton to kiss him. 

The couple strip down to swimsuits and jump in the water, the water she claimed was infested with alligators (which of course meant the show had some gators in the reel) and make out at the water's edge. Rachel describes her dad as "a tough Italian guy." 

Family:
"Tonight I am meeting Rachel's mother Mary, her father Tony and then her two friends Sam and Nate" - a lot of friends in this episode is this a covid prompted change? 

Rachel's mom screams at her appearance. And this is when we find out that Sam is a woman. Rachel's mom is very happy to hear that her daughter kept getting the group date roses. While everyone else is smiling Tony is 'dead staring.' 

Nate gets to talk to Rachel alone first "as happy as you do seem, how are these other people feeling?" Nate showing that he has watched the show "How are you feeling about fantasy suites?" Rachel "I don't know where his relationship is with other people, it is something you have to push out of your mind."

 

Sam tells Clayton "we are Italian...Tony her dad is going to be tough on you" a lot of identity politics here...is that how we say it? 

Tony tells us that he offered to beat up Rachel's past boyfriend because they had an argument. Tony and Clayton go for their talk and it leads to a commercial that returns with Rachel talking to her mom, show really trying to heighten tension here. Rachel tells her mom that she warned Clayton that her dad "doesn't like anyone." 

Back to the dad and Clayton "what is it you know about Rachel?" "I love that she is independent and that she is passionate." Tony is a softie "I watch you and I see you interact and it looks like there is nobody else" while he points out that there are three other girls. "If Rachel isn't the one what are you going to do to not hurt her?" Told you the show was just trying to heighten tension. Tony "I really cannot give my blessing because I haven't talked to my daughter...if she gives a good word when I shake your hand when you leave I will pat you on the arm." THIS IS THE MAN THE SHOW TRIED TO MAKE US THINK WOULD BE A MONSTER! My dad is tougher on me when I am deciding on shoes to leave the house in. 

Rachel tells her dad she is in love with Clayton and her dad is happy for her.

The dad gives Clayton the promised pat on the shoulder; Clayton says "I do not think this day could have gone any better." 

Rachel goes back to the whisper with Clayton "If I was falling for you before I am falling even harder now." 

"This is kind of where I am, break three hearts to make one happy." 

Back to LA:

ROSE CEREMONY: and the women are showing up in Hyundais not a limo because branding over legacy! 

Jesse Palmer sighting, so that Clayton can give us some exposition "I am falling in love with all the women in a different capacity." "I don't want to try to protect myself...I think it is only right that I give them my all, because they have given me their all."

Serene and Gabby show up in dangerous dresses. Serene is getting some background screen time that does not sound good for long term staying. 

Roses - Susie gets the first rose, Rachel appears surprised it was not hers, Gabby gets the second and there is more shock from Rachel, and I think Serene now realizes what I realized early, she is not long for this show - Rachel gets the final rose (I will admit I wrote that even before Clayton did the overly contrived look down then look up move to announce it.). 

Bachelor Recap or, Does Clayton know what a belt is?

 While some of the crew are sipping on bourgeois drinks I am eating way too many cookies. 

We return to the hotel while Sarah's one on one is still ongoing and Gabby still looks like she had just strawpedo'd a wine bottle.

 

Sarah walks in holding a rose and tells the waiting girls that "it is no one's place to tell Clayton what they think I am ready for...I hope that you can tell me who brought this to him" Mara heavy sighs. While Sarah monologues Mara makes faces and smirks she then says "I talked to him about how I felt about my situation....he want's an engagement at the end of this, I have been here from day one ready for an engagement." Sarah decides to twist the knife "one last thing, Clayton identified this as a last ditch effort, the person that did this is going home."

This has got to be a producer pushed question since Sarah sniffs the rose and says "smells like, something you will not be smelling tomorrow. Sayonara, biatch." 

COCKTAIL CEREMONY: 
Serene gets some of the narrative work while she gets ready "nine of us, three already have roses" etc. 

The ladies feel the tension of the moment. 

Serene gets pulled first, I had a few teachers that looked similar to Serene as a kid and I just know kids in her school are starting to awaken to feelings they did not initially understand. 

Clayton says he has jars of fireflies (not real insects) to honor Serene's dead cousin (because of her story of getting fireflies with the cousin in her youth), but his delivery is so botched it is not believable that this is his idea. Serene however is all about it "it shows that he listened and remembered" or something similar because I started laughing so hard. 

As Clayton tells us the night is starting off great "almost too good" we see Mara striding to go and talk to Sarah. Mara tells Sarah that her "last ditch effort" comment from the night before was condescending "and ignorant."

Mara tells Sarah that "you are getting a little sloppy and it is showing" especially funny since Mara is holding a drink glass and is looking a little sloppy herself.

I guess Rachel really is emotional about the Sarah and Mara confrontation because she whispers in her ITM after eavesdropping. 

 

ROSE CEREMONY: 

Roses to Susie (Gabby starts to tell us she wants "a rose so bad" you and all the ladies Gabby), Serene, Gabby, final rose to Genevieve which means Mara and Eliza are going home. 
I fully expect Serene to make it to hometowns but I feel there is ZERO chance she is winning this, I would love to be surprised but I would bet the house on this before I see it happening. 
Mara surprises everyone by being bubbly in her goodbye - While she might cry in her ITM she tells us that she expects to find her person. So the reason I cannot see Serene winning, look at the interaction that was happening with Genevieve and Clayton vs Eliza and Clayton and he keeps Genevieve ("G")? G looks like she barely wants to be there when she is around Clayton. 

Off to Vienna: Genevieve still does not get a one on one.

 

ONE ON ONE: 

Susie gets picked up for the "Pretty Woman" date that every season has. "I have never had someone take me into a shop and say pick anything you want" Susie I hate to tell you HE IS NOT THE ONE CAUSING THIS! You know what? I am being unkind - for all we know a producer said "have you ever had anyone take you into a shop and say pick anything you want?" and Susie is just replying honestly and then it is cut to make me think she is a simpleton...or both things are true. Susie is taken to try on some haute couture and there is a lot of ruffles and feathers. DOES CLAYTON UNDERSTAND THE WORD 'BELT'? Susie comes out in an outfit wearing a gold belt and Clayton calls it a "waist thing" uhmm what? 

Because this show knows how to push jealousy Susie is sent back to the group with her packages and Gabby is not happy, she simulates being stabbed in the throat.

When Susie shows the bottom of her new shoes to make sure we all know they are Louboutins Gabby attempts to test if looks could kill she has been practicing all season.

To add to it while Susie is in her room and the others are on the mini couch of destiny a gentleman walks in asking for "Fraulein Susie" carrying a red gown which causes Serene to exclaim "Red is his favorite color!" and "I wish I was wearing that dress in front of him."  

Evening: 

Susie wears her dress to meet Clayton at the Schonbrunn palace (hopefully I got that right but if I didn't if you know you know, if you don't it wont matter).

Susie "no man has ever wanted to treat me like that" uhmm sis, many a man has probably WANTED to treat you like that but they could NOT AFFORD to do it. Susie of course gets the date rose. 

Chris De Burgh!

The show actually gets someone I know and he is singing HIS HIT "The Lady in Red" so yes Serene maybe red is his favorite color but if his fave color was chartreuse best believe Susie was still getting a red dress! While the couple is getting serenaded a date card arrives and based on it the one on one is going to Serene. 

Clayton says "being able to spoil you today was so special to me" bro you know you aint got money like that. 

GROUP DATE: 

And the group meets up with a psychoanalyst because "Vienna is the birth place of modern psychotherapy."

They will all be going through couples therapy with Clayton - Genevieve says she has chosen not to go to therapy because she does not like to talk about things...I get it.

Gabby goes first, she says she is feeling anxious and wants to share more with her partner; this all feels performative, not so much Gabby but the whole thing 2 people who barely know each other are talking to a therapist while one partner will be doing this repeatedly with 4 of them as he cycles them out for the therapist to get snippets of who they are and their connection? Teddi "I feel open" Clayton "Teddi is so very honest with me...I am more drawn to her because of her vulnerability which is what I want" I know he didn't mean it, but it felt like a reference to her virginity. 

G is told "try to express what you feel" there is a long pause and then an expletive. The therapist "so if Clayton cannot see what is going on inside you it will be very difficult for a relationship" "So what does Clayton need to do?" G responds "I don't know"...Eliza WAS RIGHT THERE! 

Clayton asks to speak to G away from the therapist "I just want to thank you for being you" (such coach speak) and then boots her because "time is running out" gotta keep an eye on the game clock.

Cynic in me, G just wanted a trip to a new city once she got to explore Vienna she was done with Clayton. Clayton goes back to the 4 remaining women and tells them "with hometowns just around the corner I have to make tough decisions" he lets them know that he booted G and then tells them "see you downstairs" Rachel "to go after that I am definitely nervous." 

Sarah to the girls "I am weirdly excited...because I love therapy, I love talking about myself!" Sarah treats this like a game.

Sarah immediately thanks the therapist "for doing this." While she is gone the other ladies are talking about her and Gabby says she thinks Sarah tells them about her time with Clayton as a tactic. Teddi was initially saying Sarah did not mean to intimidate the other girls but then...maybe? 

The therapist meets with the group as a whole and says "some of them weren't honest and they were, let's call it performative." Clayton looks as shocked as he can pretend to register. The psychotherapist does not bother to say who was being performative. Rachel tells us that she Teddi and Gabby are going to have to band together to talk to Clayton about Sarah. 

Evening: 

Rachel goes first Clayton immediately says "therapist said someone was being performative and I know that was not you."

Rachel knows it is time for the jugular so she tells Clayton that Sarah came in after her first one on one and told them that she and Clayton cried on her one on one. Clayton is more concerned that Sarah "said I cried?" He wants to make it clear that he did not cry. 

Gabby "definitely we all tried to steer clear" she is following the formula Sarah, bus, under. 

Teddi "I was thinking of leaving but none of it had to do with you." 

Now Sarah gets her time on the couch with Clayton, she is already looking nervous. Sarah takes the crying tact,

it is generally a strong tact but here..."I just wanted to leave at one point because it is so heartbreaking" Clayton is over it "I'm just gonna be real with you, I really felt you were trying to fake cry there with me. Like it didn't feel genuine at all."

Sarah with no hint of tears or remorse back to normal voice "Honestly I have no tears left because this has been a really tough week." Clayton "what scares me is that it was almost like you were trying to manipulate these women into getting them to quit...we are done, I just cannot move forward with you and I would like to walk you out." Clayton walks Sarah past the women on the couch and Rachel and Gabby's jaws literally drop

. Sarah makes one last desperate plea at the car door "What we have built is so strong." "Sarah I just don't believe you." Clayton returns to the women picks up the rose and says "with what happened here tonight I just cannot give this rose out tonight" cruel way to do it, I told you weeks ago he is weak, back home we say sopsy. 

ONE ON ONE:

Serene asks Clayton "I know last night was really tough for you, are you okay?" Serene takes a smart tack and says "hearing that stuff was very hard but I trusted in you" that is right, play up to his ego. 

Oh man I am going to rack up fantasy points this week, I have Serene on my team and you get points for 'random strangers' interacting like here where we pretend the couple just happens to meet people in the street dancing and yup this show tries to pretend this is just something that happened by chance. 

Evening: 
Serene is drop dead gorgeous in her evening look. Serene tells Clayton "I wanted to tell you, I am falling in love with you." Clayton is overjoyed, I think, his face cracks into a grin and he licks his lips before a kiss. Damn, they get to go and see Klimt's 'The Kiss' and I envy that moment I have always wanted to see it in person...Clayton says "it is called The kiss and we have to recreate it" sure they kiss but it is not a recreation. Literally they are standing in front of the painting they claim they want to recreate and do nothing to make it look like the painting. Sadly these 2 live persons lack the intimacy we see in a long created painting. 

ROSE CEREMONY: 
Until tonight I did not pay attention to the fact that Teddi is from Cali, for some reason I just thought she lived in the south, granted it is Highland, CA so it is south adjacent. 

Rose to Rachel (house money) she whispers "I will" to "will you accept this rose?" and then the final rose of the night goes as I expected to Gabby not Teddi. As Teddi is walked out Gabby whispers "She is so graceful" struck me in the same vein as "she is so articulate" but I do not think she meant it that way.