I guess my friends can tick me off to point that I almost get a ticket

Last night I almost got a ticket for driving the wrong way on a One-way street. I talked my way out of the ticket. Robin claims that I was only able to do that because the cop was a lady, Yau added the colour of her skin. I claim it was my charm (maybe a bit to do with the voice).

So here is the thing. I turned the wrong way for a variety of reasons; the sign detailing that it was a one way street had been damaged and turned at a bad angle, if I had been as diligent as I normally am I would have spotted it but I was not at my best so I missed it.
I was distracted because one friend had yelled at me for not following her directions, then yelled again when I chose not to park where she wanted me to park.
Then on top of that I had to listen to the 2 kids in the back that had already annoyed me with their inability to keep it down when I was on the phone then when Robin was on the phone break into childhood songs loudly and OFFKEY. Trust me there is nothing worse than 2 people singing badly and at the top of their lungs when you are already peeved.

So I hit my breaking and braking point in that I was so frustrated that I slammed on the brakes flipped on the indicator and turned where I should not have turned! Right into the path of a cop. I am still surprised I talked my way out of the ticket and I am glad I asked her if she was giving me a ticket when she said "ok sit tight I am going to my car" if I had just assumed that she was just going to check my id she would have come back with a ticket and by that point it would have been too late.

Even though you know you have no warrants out...waiting for those agonizing few minutes while a cop runs your id to make sure is agonizing. What adds to the anxiety is hearing your friend loudly tell the bouncer at the door across from you car "I am here with the criminal" (which by the way is a bloody funny line...but scary while the cop is checking to see if you need to be locked up).

So yeah, I blew my lid and still somehow survived...luckily. What is funny is that I can see how movies influence our thought processes: At one point in the drive I imagined driving off a cliff jumping out at the last minute and still hoping I would have the dexterity and speed to turn around and hit the door lock button to trap my passengers so that they would hit the water...I did not want them dead, just a bit panicked and soaked.

Thank goodness frustration does not lead me to drinking because that would have been one sloppy Taco Tuesday!

This song fits:

Insight to the Cali J, 100mph and self therapy through driving

Just a basic insight into me: I hate losing friends; in fact I really cannot stand losing friends. I will do crazy things to try and keep friends, to the point that I will walk through East Village (home to SDPD’s headquarters and constantly patrolled by cop cars) with a golf club on the way to visit a friends house determined to make sure that should unpleasantness arise from 3rd parties I am ready to ‘play through’.

I cannot always explain what is going on in my mind and heart. I am generally cold and calculating, I agonize over decisions and tend not to be ruled by passion, BUT unfortunately for me, I sometimes have flashes of red hot insanity run through my brain. Let me explain that a little bit, I sometimes after thinking and re-thinking something will suddenly just go with whatever flashes in my mind. For instance one night in the club (without any alcohol in me) I met a young punk that outweighed me by at least 40lbs the guy was really pissing me off, but I knew that under normal circumstances there was no way I could win a fight with the kid so I calmly walked away then suddenly felt myself running through the club and flying at the kid boot first…nothing rational about it I just attacked the guy deserved it, but prior to that I thought I had convinced myself that a fight with him was not going to happen.

That somewhat explains tonight, I knew such a night would come, I knew I had to make the visit and I knew that the visit could be awkward, and potentially bad. I knew all of this while I was walking down the street whistling and pretending that I was Tiger Woods. So what did I do? I arrived at the home and left the club in the car. Why? Because though passion might have flicked in my brain while I was leaving the house and told me to grab the putter, rational thinking said handle it with words when I got out of the car.

BUT, when pissed off I am a crazy man behind the wheel, and I always always take out my anger when driving. If anyone knows the interchange from the 805 to the 15 highway you will know that the sign says take it at 35mph, I took it at 87mph and had to fight like a mad man to rein the car back in AND I LOVED IT. Those tires left a great streak on the road and helped to clear my head, I came out of the curve and punched that car up to a 100 and by the time I got close to home everything was ordered in my head.

Should this have been the last night we ever speak my dear…It was a good run I had fun, I think you did too and no matter what I may have done, at least I stayed honest.

SELAH.