Always cracks me up when I recognize a vacation spot the franchise goes to before they list it because I immediately start thinking "Am I a Basic?"
The show goes to Puerto Vallarta and Michelle says "I cannot believe I am in this place (while pointing down)" and I cannot help but think she forgot where they are.
Michelle and Kaitlyn take a walk on the beach wearing the tourist look of 'breezy but covered.'
Michelle is telling Kaitlyn that she has fears that Nayte is not ready (maybe this is why she was sent for the walk and not Tayshia) and Kaitlyn says "really pay attention to those fears with Nayte...I wish I had on my season."
Tayshia comes in to explain to the guys what the fantasy suite means,. no cameras "all the pressure off and just really dive in."
The first date goes to Brandon (note all the guys are together and I think the show does this when the group seems too friendly with each other). Joe says "seeing Brandon go off with someone I am in love with there are a lot of emotions [stares blankly at camera]"
Date one - Brandon:
Off into the rainforest the lucky couple goes and Michelle wears a bathing suit top that only a few can pull off. Michelle wraps her legs around Brandon for a kiss.
Horseback riding, and this will be Brandon's first time.
Evening:
Brandon tells Michelle he is in love with her "and until I take my last breath I will put you first." After the exchange of lovey doveys they of course take the fantasy suite offer. Fireworks go off while they make out in a pool/hot tub and Nayte and Joe are forced to watch. Nayte says "tonight was a reality check."
Morning after:
We get the hinted post coitus in bed together scene, then Brandon carrying a breakfast in bed tray that he claims he "whipped up something special" while it is clearly under room service warming trays. The couple then has a food fight on the white sheets...they are half white.
Back to the hotel with Joe and Nayte nervously wondering - in wanders Brandon and he has to sit between them, producers are so hoping for forced conflict. The guys all nervously laugh at each other and Brandon voices "this is awkward."
Date two - Joe:
Joe and Mich are going to zip line down to the main area of their date.
Michelle tells Joe she enjoys seeing his goofy side and he needs to bring it out more often.
Evening Date:
Lovey Doveys and Mich asks Joe how many kids he wants. They both say they want to change the world or something similar you know I start to fade out during these dates.
Cut back to the hotel and Nayte and Brandon are discussing which one of them is in the better position by virtue of when their date will be, both are convinced they are in the prime spot.
Fantasy suite invite and Joe says "I am 100% on board" Michelle "I would love to have that time with you."
If Michelle is worried that Nayte is not ready for commitment his cavalier attitude when discussing what she and Joe might be up to in the fantasy suite would concern her more.
Morning after:
Again we get the hinted post coitus in bed together scene and Joe tells Mich "I love that you are a morning person." I would not be your faithful blogger if I did not point out that the rays coming in makes it look like almost mid day.
Joe returns to the room with the other 2 and cannot help smiling when trying to keep his date a secret. Joe and Brandon are becoming more and more suspicious of Nayte's feelings for Mich because he does not seem outwardly concerned that the others dated her while he spent a week away from her.
Date three - Nayte:
Michelle rolls up on a catamaran to pick Nayte up.
I am too lazy to keep track of these dates historically, but it feels like this is the type of date usually reserved for the leading contender. Nayte tells Mich "I am very very crazy about you" but much of his conversation is the type that comes from a tall good looking man who has not had to work hard to attract partners.
In her ITM Mich tells us "I am crazy about Nayte" but she is still wary. Going into tonight she wants Nayte to tell her "that he loves me."
Evening portion:
Mich asks Nayte if he has anything on his mind and he does not take her bait and says "nothing." To spur him on Mich reminds him that an engagement is expected at the end of the show. Michelle asks Nayte "falling in love, being in love and getting engaged are all 3 different things which one of these are you?" Nayte says "all three." Mich is taking no chances so she reiterates that she can see herself engaged at the end of this and asks Nayte is he is willing to be engaged he tells her yes.
Morning after:
At this point is it still considered the 'hinted' post coitus in bed together scene? Michelle is gushing about Natye.. She is in love. The happy couple gets a mariachi band serenading them...guess we know who the producers think is the lead candidate.
Rose Ceremony:
Can we take a moment to comment on Tay tay and Kaitlyn's outfits?
Brandon and Joe are dressed in classic suit looks while Nayte is wearing a t-shirt blazer combo (I know it is a style choice but I am not confident in it). Michelle is telling the guys that the decision she has to make has her stomach tied up in knots. Brandon interrupts Mich to say "before we start do you think that I can talk to you." Nayte thinks Brandon is doing a "Hail Mary because [he] is desperate."
Brandon tells Mich that he pulled her aside so that even if it is his last day there he wants her to know he has her back. Selfishly because I need the fantasy points I was hoping Brandon was about to self eliminate, those would have been some serious points for me.
Nayte and his ugly ensemble get the first rose, I think what bothers me is that the collar of the t-shirt looks ragged. The 2nd and final rose goes to Brandon. Joe just stares ahead like he is memorizing every detail of this scene for a diorama that he is going to ceremoniously set fire to later.
Even as she lets him go Mich tells Joe she is in love with him.
Joe tells us that he is in shock, "I really did not see that coming...I wonder what Brandon said."
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