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Sunday, August 07, 2016

Bachelorette recap or "Wait you can do that in a Fantasy suite?"

We resume where we left off, the rose ceremony is progressing and ARB (Aaron Rodgers' Bro) gets Rose 1, then Robbie Rose 2 then OMCH shows up to tell us one rose remains and Rose 3 goes to Chase. Luke looks stunned. Jojo (J) walks him out and Luke says "this is not supposed to be happening" J is bawling. Luke says he had no clue that he was not saying enough. I sip some more of the Red Stripe my mom brought up from Jamaica and think 'this is the only thing good about this experience.'

J is crying so much you would think she is the one that was let go.

The Show goes off to Thailand and J quickly gets over Luke.

Robbie gets the first date:

And it is storming, so they go and get "Thai massages in Thailand." Robbie is telling J that he has been honest with her from day one. He uses his own words as proof - she knows he is honest because he told her he loves her - say what?

Going into the dinner portion J tells us that she is wary of Robbie. She brings up the fact that Ben told her he loved her last time, a lot. Robbie gives J a note that his dad wrote him basically a 'keep the faith' note as a sign that he is in it for her. This makes no sense, (even though J gushes about it) your dad writes you a personal note, you give it to the girl and that proves that you are honest? Shouldn't she be hanging out with the note writer then, if the note shows truth?
Robbie accepts the fantasy suite even before reading it (they force him to read it out loud anyway). Cut to the morning after and it is breakfast in bed time. They are both in Pajamas/lounging clothes, how did that get into the fantasy suite? Are we not adult enough to see 'walks of shame?'

ARB is up now:
J tells us that she has planned a hike for them, I bet if you asked her anything about the hike the producer would have to mouth the words to her. They claim that the hike is very strenuous but, the peeps hiking behind them seem fairly chill. The hike leads to a temple (this show has desecrated more temples than World War 2) J has to put on a shirt with sleeves and they have to follow the rules of no kissing in the temple. They claim that it is very hard to sit there and not kiss.

The evening portion and they continue talking a lot about J's family coming to Thailand, note that is the next stage not the current stage, this is basically J planning ahead for them, nothing obvious here at all. J is worried about ARB's stability he keeps saying "right now" he can be anywhere she needs him to be - He then says "I want to spend the rest of my life with you" and she responds with "that is what Ben said." That gets old fast!
ARB does the pretense of thinking about the fantasy suite but he of course accepts it. J tells us that she loves ARB she just is not ready to tell him.
Breakfast in bed time and again PJs

Chase completes the run of dates:
He pulls up on a scooter looking less than confident. J calls chase extra playful as they horse around in a fish market. I confess, I zoned out through much of this date portion it was boring. BUT, while we show Chase musing on the beach Robbie shows up at J's hotel room. After making out with him J then points out that she is currently on a date. Chase buddy, pack your bags.

To the evening portion; and Chase shoots himself in the foot telling J that he is scared but he still gets the fantasy suite because it is J. BUT, because it is J, Chase keeps talking and talking while in the fantasy suite and he puts doubt in J's mind. She asks him for a moment and walks off to spend some alone time. Chase is left sitting on the couch alone and he has to know this is bad. J tells him that she is not feeling it and Chase is telling her that he is shattered "now love equals get the [bleep] out?" He is pissed off and doesn't think that J gave it a chance.

J tells him that if she had met him outside of all the other relationships they would probably be together, yeah that is what a guy wants to hear. Chase starts to walk away and J runs after him crying, she basically wants Chase to reassure her, it is a bit weird. Chase cracks a beer as he enters the bus to go home "This sucks, get a fantasy suite card to be sent home, it's like pull your pants down so I can kick you in the nuts."

Rose Ceremony time:
The guys show up and meet OMCH and his pedantic questions.
J starts off the ceremony telling the remaining 2 guys that she sent Chase home and he was angry and upset and "I have not been able to stop thinking about...[trails off]" because Chase shows up at the Rose ceremony. Chase pulls J aside to go and talk to her. Both Robbie and ARB both start to dab their brows (and makeup) with handkerchiefs as Robbie begins to worry. Chase tells her he is not there to ask her to take him back, he is just there because he didn't like how their initial parting ended. I think he is just acutely aware that he does not want America to have an impression of him mistreating the Bachelorette.

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Cali-J ueber alles in der Welt. Some think that I am mean; (I call them friends), in fact I am not that mean. What I am is sarcastic and dry to the sandpaper level. I have friends that I have never said a kind word to their face, but I praise to the ends of the earth to anyone I know and will defend them to the end. That’s just how I roll! My boys know that I am down for them, my girls know that no matter what I will keep them safe (and occasionally flirt with them [If you are a female friend of mine and think I haven’t flirted with you it just means you didn’t notice, it was extremely subtle or…not yet ]). No one is safe from my sarcasm even my own parents; hence of course as a kid I spent a significant amount of time in punishment. I treat people with respect if I think they deserve it – everyone starts off with the same amount of respect from me (a lot). You don’t need to earn my respect; you have to keep my respect.