The New COOL RUNNINGS!

So in less than 3 hours the co-summer Associate and the Cali- J will race against 14 executives from our corporation in Go-Karts. Despite the highly professional atmosphere of our corp I could not resist wearing a bright yellow polo with the Jamaican flag stitched on. Since I already threatened to put the VP into the wall ala NASCAR, I might as well go whole hog and let everyone be able to see me, no matter what part of the track they are on. Guess the email that I sent telling everyone about my guaranteed chances of victory and all the bets I placed wont come back to haunt me.

Finally a new TV has arrived!

So the Casa de CaliJ Hawaiian-Tropic crib now has a new TV in the living room. Nothing like lugging a heavy TV across the street: The racist and I kept cracking jokes about stopping people and offering to sell them the television “real cheap” since the 2 minorities in sandals lugging a nice TV at 11pm at night didn’t look shady enough. Weird moment of the night, the guy who we bought the TV from is actually my former neighbor from first year – “It’s a small world after all”

Are you serious Mexico?

Come on man, comic character or not that one is pushing it! Maybe it isn’t actually racist, but it sure as hell looks a lot like it.

FREE ICE CREAM!!!

Free Ice cream today at all Starbucks locations. The Cali-J always looking out for loyal readers; plus I want to get y’all as fat as I am.

Ready or NOT!

To the 2 of you that read this blog and even know where to find BET on your cable list; Tell me you didn’t get goose bumps when the curtains went up and you heard “Ready or not here I come…” and saw that the Fugees have reunited and MAY put out an album. That 12 minute set was crazy hype - poor Lauren she sang herself hoarse. The main thing that set served to show though was that more than anyone else, Pras really, really, really needs the group to get back together.

Taco Tuesday?

I know I said it should be banned last week. But after reading Sarbanes Oxley (if you don't know it - count your blessings) for 3 solid hours I want to go to the mind numbing wasteland that is PB. So to the usual crew lets saddle up; I will be hitting you up on IM.

Jerk Chicken

With the new addition of a Grill (charcoal of course; the Caribbean does not condone gas grilling “fi di authentic jerk”) I will reclaim my position as King of the Grill. Yesterday was steak and I have witnesses as to its good taste. This weekend; The Original Jerk Chicken returns to the Cali-J’s menu.

Why would you say that to me?

Memo to ex-gf and any other people that fall in or around that category; ending a phone conversation with the words “I gotta run I have to go lick whipped cream off someone!” is not guaranteed to illicit a good response from me. What am I supposed to say; “Go get ‘em; Atta girl; You the champ; No one licks like you?

(Knowing my life there will probably be many posts with this title in the future)

What a locksmith!

I heard of this while driving into work this morning and didn’t think it was legit so I had to look it up, turns out it is legit – a man swallowed a key and then because the key was needed to operate his friends truck they took an x-ray of his stomach that showed the key to a locksmith and the locksmith was able to fashion a key (that actually worked) from the x-ray. How good is this locksmith?

There is an alarm clock that will attempt to wake you up using the smell of cooking bacon; the kicker is that there is actual bacon cooking in your room to wake you up. (It does make it easier to run that game about making breakfast for the girl in the morning!)

NATIONAL CHAMPS!!!

THE TEXAS LONGHORNS are the 2005 College World Series CHAMPS! After the last OK disaster I said immediately after "At least we will be champs in baseball!" and I was right. GO HORNS GO! Zandra you can't come out here if you dont bring me some championship gear.

Purity test!

I just scored so low on a purity test that I may have to reconsider even applying for the Moral Character check, though I did beat 2 other people from the law school. But, then again they are great friends of mine so what does that say about me.?

Since when is Tom Cruise a scientific and health expert?

Damn it…I want to slam him as a crack-pot but I do agree with some of his positions; I do believe children and adults are being over-medicated; I do believe that often instead of trying to work with a child that kid is slapped on a prescription. BUT, I do not believe that because a mistake may or may not have been made diagnosing Tom back in the day means that the entire field of Psychiatry is pseudo-science!

Interesting interview between Cruise and a German reporter, reporter was one of the few that didn’t seem to be cowed by the star power of Cruise and Spielberg and I love how he calls out Cruise on the success of Scientology!

And the NEW...

NBA champions are the SAN ANTONIO SPURS. Props to Detroit they did better than I expected, but in the end the right thing happened. It's been a good week so far; Spurs win; Get to kick it in a suite tomorrow at the baseball game; and, Hopefully this weekend the HORNS take the CWS title!

Is this a good thing?

Not too sure that I like the ruling by the Supreme Court today allowing local governments the ability to seize homes and businesses even against the owners’ will for PRIVATE ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT!!!!

GO HORNS GO!

Texas has made the finals going through undefeated: Our closer is the top rated closer in College ball and is up for the highest award for pitchers!

Ban Taco Tuesday!

Nah not really, but the after effects are deadly. I am operating on very little sleep. I am dehydrated, with blood shot eyes, and I am secreting 80 proof out of every pore. Seriously despite the shower and the ton of water that I have consumed I can still feel alcohol leaking out of me. I have a presentation in 40 minutes and I already know that I will not be able to go near any of the viewers. So I decided to help myself stay awake by drinking Mountain Dew since Jolt doesn’t seem to be in our cafeteria and I just realized that I have consumed 64 ounces of the damn drink so far today (note 64 ounces of water is the RDA) which means that I have consumed about 270mg of caffeine; which explains the fact that my fingers just keep twitching.

Alabama Assholes!

A radio host in Alabama is telling people to boycott Aruba because of the missing young lady. That’s wrong: While I am saddened that this girl is missing telling people to boycott the island is wrong, getting angry that a missing American is no longer the lead story on another Country’s Newspaper is wrong. When people from other countries go missing here we don’t expect or want them to boycott us, and we certainly don’t splash it across the front of our newspapers. Let us not let our grief/sensationalism/apathy/desire towards results get the better of us. Update to the original post: The assholes actually want to blacklist the Entire Caribbean!!! What a pair of IDIOTS!

Rocking to Britney - Oh the shame!!!

I think I may have to officially turn in my race card; It’s bad enough that driving in to work today I heard an ad for Kelly Clarkson at the County fair and thought “Hmm I should get a ticket” (For Kelly Clarkson???); but, the icing on the cake had to have occurred yesterday when I had to borrow my room-mate’s car because my brakes were being replaced (damn ex-gf cut the brakes [not really but it sounds better that way]) So I borrowed Dan’s car, thanks a million for the loaner Dan, and I am driving home on the highway.

I had a hard time figuring out his CD changer because I couldn’t find the remote for it, so once it started to play a CD I just went with it. Unfortunately it was a Britney Spears compilation CD, not the most young black male-esque disc but whatever I just wanted music. So now anyone who has driven on the highway with the windows down knows that you have to turn the radio up louder than you would if on a regular street. So the radio was blaring Britney and sadly it had to be “Oops I did it again” just as I exited the 163N heading to Linda Vista. So not thinking, I am actually bobbing my head to Britney and thinking to myself “Hey this is not the worst thing to listen to on earth” just as I am in the middle of a head knock I look to my right and see 4 guys in a mustang staring at me – yep just my luck while rocking out to Britney I had the misfortune to be spotted by 2 black guys and 2 Hispanics; 3 of whom are wearing bandannas 1 has on a raiders jersey, the others are kicking it in the big ass shirts normally affiliated with gang wear – so basically the stereo-typed gang banger type. I swear it seems like they turned down their radio to make sure they weren’t wrong in what they thought I was listening to. The look of disgust on their faces was almost comical, the only option left for me was to do the slight head nod of recognition, turn my radio down and stare straight ahead with the back of my neck burning with shame.

So though I may not have completely lost my race card, my credit is hanging on by a thin line. It doesn’t matter that as soon as I got home I immediately put on some “gangsta” music the damage was already done!!!

Amazing story

I just wish the lions had mauled those bastards!
Can 70% of a country's marriages really be formed through abduction? DAMN!

Cal beats USC?????

I think people have too quickly written off Cal this year. The game against the Trojans is at Cal this year and if there is one game that the Bears will be chomping at the bit for it has to be this one. This is I think Cal's chance to show the world that they were not a one hit wonder. By Nov 12th when they face USC the Cal destiny should have been determined and they will either be playing solely for pride or will be gunning for a BCS spot, either way I like their chances playing at home. Go BEARS!