Infrequently updated consistently funny

Friday, August 10, 2007

Few random moments

Few personal moments:
You: You know who you are, everytime I talk to you I end up pissed off
Me: Wa-wow, I am missing you, looks like I WILL have to take you out on a date
Weight: Fluctuating more than Oprah's, if I could only quit ice cream, I would be golden, ok and then maybe alcohol, and steaks, but mainly ice cream..."I wish I could quit you"

Few Crazy sports stories:
Rick Ankiel: So damn happy that he is back in the big leagues (look him up, it will warm your heart)
Reggie Miller: At 42 considering playing in the NBA again
Allan Houston: Thinking about coming back
Jordan: Well he has not said anything but isn't he about due for another come back?

Few Amusing moments to me:
Britney Spears: Is it time to just arrest her for stupidity? She hit a parked car while being filmed by the press and just went shopping without bothering to leave a note...I wonder if she was surprised when the car's owner 'discovered' who hit her car
John Daly: Leading Tiger Woods in a major
My writing: The love poem I wrote as a lark is so painfully funny that I have to destroy it...if anyone ever saw it I might get labelled as an imbecile.
Fantasy Football: Those punks thinking they have a chance this year

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Cali-J ueber alles in der Welt. Some think that I am mean; (I call them friends), in fact I am not that mean. What I am is sarcastic and dry to the sandpaper level. I have friends that I have never said a kind word to their face, but I praise to the ends of the earth to anyone I know and will defend them to the end. That’s just how I roll! My boys know that I am down for them, my girls know that no matter what I will keep them safe (and occasionally flirt with them [If you are a female friend of mine and think I haven’t flirted with you it just means you didn’t notice, it was extremely subtle or…not yet ]). No one is safe from my sarcasm even my own parents; hence of course as a kid I spent a significant amount of time in punishment. I treat people with respect if I think they deserve it – everyone starts off with the same amount of respect from me (a lot). You don’t need to earn my respect; you have to keep my respect.