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Monday, December 05, 2005

Rambling post...finals have me aggitated damn it!

Well talk about an action packed day…finally figured out when the Cali-J would be returning home. I leave Cal on Thursday and get into Jamaica on Friday and from that point on the Hedonism kicks off. Why am I so determined to enjoy it all to the fullest? Well in a 4 hour span, I have pissed of one friend to the point where she won’t talk to me, another called to inquire if I/we were still friends, an ex doesn’t trust or believe my motives and finally I lost a friend completely. Not my choice, I do not believe in betraying friends or in ditching them, as mean and sarcastic as I am I know that words are just words and for me to cut someone off as a friend they would have to do something egregious.

To let you in on how forgiving I am of friends, this particular ex-friend (and once again I told you it’s not my decision if it were up to me we would still be friends) and I sort of dated while I was in law school [yeh I know, I keep my stuff quiet and no one knows who I date etc and no she is not a law student] any way this particular young lady engages in sexual congress with a friend of mine and had the audacity to call me during said activity. Needless to say I was PISSED, but whatever I let that slide, and we remained friends. Then there of course came the usual back and forth because let’s be honest I am not the easiest friend to have, not meaning to get peeps mad I can with ease. Anyway back to the chica, so on her terms we stopped talking for a couple of months because she needed time away from me (perfectly understandable because I am hard to take [wanted to put swallow here but seemed like bad context])

Then once I had perfectly adjusted to the new state of my life, school, work chill, drink with the crew, I got a late night call…and had an incident similar to the type that occurred almost a year ago, I am too lazy to go find it and link it but long time readers will remember my driving to some chics home only to have her new bf who I knew nothing about accost me on the steps for ‘a talk’ so anyway my response on the phone (no I didn’t go over – and no SA I did the right thing by not going) was hey it’s cool to hear from you but you can’t expect me to just show up at your beck and call. But at least we are back to talking.

My birthday rolled around and being the dope that I am, and the spread joy type I invited her to come out to the club (great night by the way – if you weren’t there that’s your fault). After all she had always told me how important birthdays were to her and how they are something that must always be celebrated etc. Hmm, I guess I must have misunderstood that, because not only was my invitation rejected, I was ignored for the entire month and informed later that she was too busy hooking up with some dude, because being around me was not good for her so it was best that I get punked in order for her to move on.

Cot damn even then we remained friends though by this point, one would have to say it’s a loose term then of course there was tonight (I have bypassed stuff like her telling her friends I am a dick [true] and her friends consoling her with the [“He ain’t any good crap”] funny I didn’t know we were dating anymore! And her having a friend call me late one night to deliver a message, that she should have delivered herself) while I should be studying I had to get the “We should not be friends” crappy line and then the projected and I will cut it from my text message so I do not post the wrong thing “…you think I am lacking in character. Why would you even want to associate with that” That was in response to my saying what was done re my birthday was messed up, and now I have to think maybe she is right, why should I want to associate with that? Maybe cause I am a sucker for friends.

YES SADLY IF SHE WANTS I WILL STILL TAKE HER BACK AS A FRIEND. Because in my mind, it’s the ability to forgive that often makes peeps the best of friends…this quality doesn’t work for other relationships so don’t try this with me if u r my gf or wife.


aarond said...

"dude, i can't even see myself dating anybody in the near future... i feel like my life's too messed up right now" So my post has spurred some comments from friends my boy sent those words to me just as my other friend wrote " speaking of relaitonships...i am realizing that i'm not ready to be with someone even tho i wanted to be recently" By the way I am not a fan of peeps cutting and pasting in IM convos (ask first people). Anyway it seems like law students, just aren't that good with relationships. Right at this moment I can't say I disagree with either of my friends right now. To the other young ladies that I dated in secret the last couple years, none of you overlapped with each other.

The Wifey said...

You were dating other people?!? YOU BASTARD!!!!


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Cali-J ueber alles in der Welt. Some think that I am mean; (I call them friends), in fact I am not that mean. What I am is sarcastic and dry to the sandpaper level. I have friends that I have never said a kind word to their face, but I praise to the ends of the earth to anyone I know and will defend them to the end. That’s just how I roll! My boys know that I am down for them, my girls know that no matter what I will keep them safe (and occasionally flirt with them [If you are a female friend of mine and think I haven’t flirted with you it just means you didn’t notice, it was extremely subtle or…not yet ]). No one is safe from my sarcasm even my own parents; hence of course as a kid I spent a significant amount of time in punishment. I treat people with respect if I think they deserve it – everyone starts off with the same amount of respect from me (a lot). You don’t need to earn my respect; you have to keep my respect.