Infrequently updated consistently funny

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Things I learned partying for fashion week in Hollywood…

  • When a ‘celebrity is rolling with his entourage, pushing him out of the way to get to the restroom is not the best idea

  • Staring at a girl and licking your lips (albeit unconsciously) is definitely a come hither technique

  • When your friends drink a lot – “Man I could get my ass kicked for saying this” is not capable of being whispered by them

  • A party hosted by rappers tends to have some hot females!

  • The black guy from Reno 911 is not as tall as I thought he was

  • The black guy from Reno 911 is as cool as he seems on TV

  • The black guy from Reno 911 has chicks throwing their panties at him

  • The black guy from Reno 911 is cool with people coming up and saying “Hey this might be a bad question but…are you on TV”

  • The black guy from Reno 911 is pretty damn recognizable and is cool with being called “The black guy from Reno 911”

  • I look damn good in Canary yellow…glad I went with that and not sea foam green

  • Rolling to the club with the WHITE GUY is awesome…so often in San Diego I am THE BLACK GUY it was kind of funny to watch my friend become the minority in the club

  • Watching my friend stare at “black bootie” was worth standing in line even though we were on the guest list

  • Greg’s addition “The girl in the white shirt was hot, that’s all that I can remember”

The Black guy from Reno 911

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Um Mr. Cali Ja....where is my flava flav re-cap? You should know there are people out there that depend on your witty play by play.....CP

P.s. I think New York's mum should get her own show.

Cali J said...

CP I had delayed, to try and give more peeps a chance to catch one of the 9 million replays that VH1 is showing this week...I have been slacking though so its probably time for the F.O.L. post

Scratchie said...

So I take it that it's black bootie for the win????

Abeni said...

Staring at a girl and licking your lips is a come hither technique?

Sounds more like a turn off:)

Cali J said...

I should have mentioned that I routinely lick the bottom of my canine teeth which causes my tongue to run over my lips. A friend said it looked like I was trying to get girls that way, i disagreed until I saw that last night a girl caught me doing this and gave me a "look" back. By no means do I think licking your lips is a great technique for picking up women or even appropriate

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Cali-J ueber alles in der Welt. Some think that I am mean; (I call them friends), in fact I am not that mean. What I am is sarcastic and dry to the sandpaper level. I have friends that I have never said a kind word to their face, but I praise to the ends of the earth to anyone I know and will defend them to the end. That’s just how I roll! My boys know that I am down for them, my girls know that no matter what I will keep them safe (and occasionally flirt with them [If you are a female friend of mine and think I haven’t flirted with you it just means you didn’t notice, it was extremely subtle or…not yet ]). No one is safe from my sarcasm even my own parents; hence of course as a kid I spent a significant amount of time in punishment. I treat people with respect if I think they deserve it – everyone starts off with the same amount of respect from me (a lot). You don’t need to earn my respect; you have to keep my respect.