"She was screaming on the mic just b4 she came here"

The above is how Arsenio Hall (and come on Arsenio you are better than appearing on Flavor of love...aren't you?) described the fact that a contestant allegedly gave her ex some oral (fixation) just before appearing on the 'Reality' show.

Flavor Flav: "Honestly I do not know if I can handle a jealous woman Because I have millions and millions of girls throwing themselves at me"
--Word Flav? Millions of girls throwing themselves at you...man that means that there are millions and millions of crazy girls out there.

I hate myself every week for watching this show, and every week I watch it.

All the girls had their exes show up on this episode. One girl's ex met her on the beach in wait for it...San Diego. Really? That works? I know I am the shy guy but really it just does not seem like the spot to pick up a girl, at least not one for the long term...but what do I know. One of my friends met his girl at a club (where women take their clothes off) and they have been 2gether for FIVE years! I even think they had an Usher moment...you know what that is "Make love in the club."

I love that these girls are shocked that their exes call them out or say bad things about them. Heck that is practically the definition of an ex: Someone who no longer can stand "yo stank ass."

(A quick aside, I just saw a clip of the Bachelor that a friend sent to me (which is ironic since I am watching the Ghetto Bachelor at the same time) in it the Black girl had an 'argument' with one of the other girls. I call her the Black girl because that is how everyone knows her, Black women tend not to make it on the Bachelor and then of course this one went OFF! It is like watching the 'mad' Real World, you just sit there and hope someone will not 'show their ass' but sadly it seems only the crazy ARGUMENTATIVE black peeps make it on. BUT, let us not pretend, no race is exempt, most of the peeps on these shows are just crazy and nasty.) Ok back to your regular scheduled Flav update.

The girl named Tree (she is 6'3") wore a shirt with the stomach cut out and the boobs barely covered, hate to say it because I think big and tall girls need love too, but I think that shirt was made for a shorter woman. Then again it could just be that Flav is just so damn short, the whole date just seemed weird since Flavs head was basically right around the girl's bits!

I swear I know one of the Kats that ended up on this show as an ex Bf. I have to research this, I think he is actually boys with one of my friends.

So one of the girls has a problem with men that drink...ok cool...we all have our issues with things that peeps do...for instance the Cali J has a problem with peeps who smoke, hence I do not date girls that smoke...not telling you not to smoke I am just saying I will not date you, not your issue but mine...so let me see, you claim to know about Flavor Flav and you are shocked that he is drinking excessively? I empathize that your biological father was an alcoholic, but I do not think that you are going to be the one to change Flav! The man is a former crack head, his lips are black from smoke and he has 7 kids, trust me drinking is the least of your worries.

I maintain that the twin action thing is not cute after the age of EIGHT! And come on heifers jumping on the bed of an opponent...really? That cannot be acceptable oh wait a minute what am I saying? You 2 showed up on a reality show as twins trying to date the same man! Of course you are dumb and hoochieriffic!

(Wow Deion Sanders has a reality show now, all I want is to see a shot of his closet, I know it has to be a walk in closet and it will pretty much have suits in all colors of the rainbow, heck that could be a whole episode of the show, Deion modeling suits and peeps calling in to guess the exact color. "I think you are wearing fuchsia" Deion: "caller that was close but I am actually wearing a lilac/lavender blend with a heliotrope liner")

Ok the show is over, I need another shower, despite just showering after the gym, this show is just so damn sleazy.

On the gym note, crazy uncoordinated chick; was it necessary for you to stand right next to me in Cardio Kick Boxing and then kick to the left when the whole class was moving to the right? Thank goodness I had my guard up or I might have been wiping a shoe print of the front of my shorts...when I stopped panting in a squeaky voice.

2 guys walk into a bar...and just stare. Vol23

Shout out to Assassin! So the S.A. and I went to a bar last night and had a moment where we both were forced to realize..."We are not as cool as we think we are." So some background. Assassin and I both spotted this amazingly hot girl in the club at the same time, and I mean hot like the lyrics to "I wanna make LOVE in this club" start to make sense hot (will blog about that song later this week...it is just so damn ridiculous).

Anyway, the young lady made us both tongue tied. I am the first to admit that I have no lines, I do not use them, I do not rehearse them, so I have none. In fact when I 'pick up' a girl in the bar, it is usually an accident, like for instance I am making fun of something she did and it amused her, or, she picked me up but was nice enough to make it seem like I was the person making the move (I like that women try to save men's egos while knowing all the time that they are in control).

I mean this chick had us wrecked to the point that we played Rock, Paper, Scissors (discreetly of course) with the proviso that the loser had to go talk to her...Assassin lost, and he still has not said word one to her yet.

One of the best parts of the whole situation was that at one point the young lady looked us over, and then sat in a chair by the fire pit, directly infront of Assassin and I (we were at Altitude). So this meant that the young ladies head, (well the back of it) was directly at our crotches. I am just shy of 6 feet (6'4" with the fro) and Assassin is I think (6'4"...or something like that I can never remember, just know that he is tall).

So you would think that having the young lady right 'below' us would spur us into action...but nope, all it did was have us stare at each other and insist that the other should go talk to her. We then started trying to run through scenarios to get her to talk to us. Of course you would have expected normal peeps to conduct this in whispers but not SA and I, we conducted the whole conversation in normal bar tones. For the hottie to not have heard us she would have had to be deaf...yeah that is it she was deaf, that is why I did not spit game to her...not because I am a coward, but because she would not have been able to hear me...no clue what Assassin's excuse is. But that is mine!

So I guess the gist of this blog is to say...Assassin is a coward and he cannot pick up a girl even if she is deaf and practically has her head in his lap!








And the Cali J might be kind of weak at it too...might

Rock Chalk Jayhawk...and good friends

You know good friends are the ones who make you tilt your head, crinkly your mouth into a wry smile and say..."I need to avoid these people."

Tonight I watched the Kansas Jayhawks step up to the plate and provide us with a great national championship game! The last second shot by Chalmers to send the game to OT was amazing. Maybe now the big 12 will get some love. We put 2 teams in the Elite 8 and one team won it all. We are more than just a football conference...though we are great at that too.

Anyway after the game which was viewed at a brewery (but I did not eat or drink...I was still full from lunch) I headed to the gym and while at the gym received a call, ordering me to the bar that was next to my home...read back the old blogs and you will see where I both lamented and rejoiced the fact that a bar was literally on my block.

Let me back track, part of why I did not eat at the brewery was because I ate so much for lunch I was still full at dinner time, and since I had, had a drink with Delz during lunch it just did not seem practical to consume more alcohol. Of course after working out, the boozing restriction seemed less important.

When I went to the bar, my original intention was just to meet up with my friends cry mercy and go home to eat dinner since as noted above I had just worked out and needed nourishment. Instead once I entered the bar I was handed a G and T and it went downhill from there. The great thing about neighborhood bars is that they let you bring in outside food etc. I have never been carded at 'The Box' and I have never been hassled, so I went and got some snacks to eat inside the bar since their kitchen had already closed. And because I live Soooooooooooooooo damn close I actually ran upstairs to burn a CD for my friend while my next G and T was coming.

In fact when the neighborhood bar knows you, you can order a drink, take it to your table then leave the bar to go get the cash to pay for the drink...try doing that in a Gaslamp bar! On purpose though, I avoid the box unless others invite me to go there, and I NEVER drink alone, I maintain that rule.

But despite the pretense I loved spending time with my friends, it was great watching the game with the old USD crew and great hitting the Jewel Box with K and J, and it was fun playing the non-peacemaker role with the Twins for our late night Balboa Park excursion.

Canada will NEVER win a war...

So I always joke with my friends that we worry so much about Mexicans creeping into the country that one day Canada is just going to invade and take us all over.

Well after watching this video, I take it all back! This is a clip of some French-Canadians (the French war jokes just come too easily) firing a missile, the video is not doctored in any way, and the missile is real!



War is not funny, but damn this almost makes it seem like it could be.

Of Jamaican bomb makers and Music you should get...Estelle

Ok so I have to admit that when I first heard that a Jamaican had been held in an Orlando airport my first thought was "wow he must have had a tonne of drugs for this to make the news." Then I heard he had explosive material with him and I thought, "they must have gotten this wrong, no way a Jamaican tried to get on a plane with bombs". Then I found out it was explosive material, not put together and realized, it was probably much ado about nothing. BUT, in this post 9/11 world it is had to brush off any incident. Clearly this poor guy is messed up, The Jamaica Gleaners story about him, makes me realize there is no way this guy was going to hold it together much longer.

I am pretty certain that I am more sympathetic to him because he is Jamaican. I also think some of it has to do with the fact that he is flying with a beard that looked alot like the beard I flew up with. Plus, I am convinced through my non-scientific, scientific poll of just the people and stories I know, that going into the military and going to Iraq, completely messes with your brain.

I am also somewhat inclined to believe his story that he planned to blow stuff up in Jamaica and show his friends how to blow things up...my fear is WHAT HE PLANNED TO BLOW UP!

You should cop the Estelle album 'Shine' I am a big fan of hers. I am telling you to get the album even though I have only heard about 5 songs of hers. Look I have never steered you wrong on the blog. I know my music. While I listen to a lot of junk, my recommendations are always good. You will not regret getting her album. When I finish listening to it, I will tell you more, but her stuff is good. I would have gotten through more but I keep listening to the same songs over and over again.

Stars are just like us...they can say things just as dumb

So VH1 did a show called 40 dumbest Celeb Quotes, I saw a preview and knew i had to watch it, in fact I knew I would watch it and blog it, so I am now watching it on DVR and blogging at the same time. In fact I will just immediately type out phrases I like and then I might just might add to them, then again, the quotes by themselves seem so damn good I might not have to add anything

*I think I got all the quotes right...I hope*

Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger: I think that gay marriage should be between a man and a woman

Flavor flav: Hottie is real 'dramatical' and tried to 'hypmotize' me

Jessica Simpson; Is it kind of weird that I am getting a bit 'emotionable'

Britney Spears "I get to go overseas places like...Canada"

Anna Nicole in respons to this question from FHM: What’s the kinkiest sex you’ve had?
Well…a ghost would crawl up my leg and have sex with me at an apartment a long time ago in Texas. I used to think it was my boyfriend, and one day I woke up and it wasn’t. It was, like, a spirit and it—woo! [miming a ghost flying from under her sheets]—went up! I was freaked out about it, but then I was like, “Well, you know what? He’s never hurt me and he just gave me some amazing sex so I have no problem.

Paris Hilton: What's Wal-mart? Do they sell like wall stuff?

Al Gore: A zebra does not change its spots

Brooke Shield: Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life

Dennis Rodman: Chemistry is a class you take in high school or college, where you figure out two plus two is 10, or something

Bill Clinton: You know, if I were a single man, I might ask that mummy out. That's a good-looking mummy!" (right around the time he was being pressured re cheating on his wife)

Whitney Houston (re drug use): First of all, let's get one thing straight. Crack is cheap. I make too much for me to ever smoke crack. Let's get that straight, okay? We don't do crack. We don't do that. Crack is wack.


Gary Busey: There is nothing like changes because nothing changes but the changes

Jason Kidd (coming out of Cal AKA UC BERKELEY!) (when talking about improving a team: We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees

Paris Hilton: If I could read a book, I would definitely read one of yours

Paris Hilton (when she found her book made the best seller list): What is the Wall Street Journal? Is that good?

Britney Spears: "I've never really wanted to go to Japan, simply because I don't really like eating fish, and I know that's very popular out there in Africa"

A high school moment, and a mini rant re a fake commercial.

So everytime I see the ad for Dyson vacuums I have to chuckle and shake my head in disbelief. In the ad, the inventor wants us to believe that they are HAPPY when they have failures in the lab. Now this might cut it in highschool science labs but their is no way someone based in a commercial enterprise is happy about failures that do not yield to economic gain.

In highschool chemistry my friend and I used to sneak into the lab and mix chemicals that we had worked out formulas for in private. We were usually pretty good at actually getting the chemical formulas right. Which is strange cause it never translated into better grades. Part of the problem I guess is that we just wanted to freelance. Anyway, we once had a spectacular failure. We snuck in, and someone had messed up and left the door to the volatile chemicals (like concentrated HNO3, pure sodium and potassium (spectacular boom when dropped in water)) open and of course we had to tamper. Thing is, we did not have much time to work out the formulas like we normally did so we just went on faith and limited knowledge. Well we caused a mini explosion and had to force open a window and drop the whole mess on to the football field outside (which really was only used as the BBQ field) BUT THAT was a failure that one could be happy about...but then that was just Campion's equipment and a few chemicals, not an actual attempt to market a damn product.

So Dyson, I say Fie on ye and your fake lines.

(I really should expand on my old crazy High school lab days, no one knew the foolishness that I got into with the chemicals. Basically the rules of "2 can keep a secret if one of them is dead" Some day I will blog them out)

Anyway here is a vid to show you why high school kids should NEVER be allowed near Potassium and the like unsupervised

Stealing from a church is disgusting and other links

I firmly believe that all theft is wrong, but stealing from a church has got to put you in the gutter level. Well how apropos that this moron was stealing a Church's gutter while Easter Service was going on!

No seriously, no one saw Pam Anderson getting divorced...no one!

Bad decade to have the last name Peterson

I still remain in shock that women actively fight to date Flavor Flav, I cannot even bother to recap this week's episode properly. Short form: girl acts whorish, Flav chuckles, flashes gold teeth, ridiculous competition devised, 2 hottest chicks (relative term) win, go on dates, Make out-makeout-make out (gag). Elimination, ugly girl with bad breath booted, new girls brought into the house, realization that TOO MANY CRAZY WOMEN apparently exist in this world.

Sorry this is not a slight against women, cause men do it too, I saw I love NY and Tila Tequila, I am just not trying to date men.

Hard to believe I could feel sympathy for an Aggie!

But man they got robbed by the refs, this last picture is just proof. All game it seems the refs were caught up in the partisan atmosphere. I would love to have seen how much a UCLA loss would have killed the brackets in my pool.

Credit for the photos belongs to http://texags.com/main/forum.reply.asp?topic_id=1118800&forum_id=7

The rules for blocks are hand = ball, but damn this Kat got mugged driving to the lane, blows to the elbow and forearm do not a block make!



Wow:

March Madness begins v1.3

Can Texas go all the way? I have so many brackets out there that I have actually forgotten some of the websites I am registered with.

I am showing love to the Big 12 and Pac 10 in most of my brackets and discounting the Big East getting 8 teams in. Going chalk in most of the regions except of course for the South where I am going TEXAS Longhorns all the way.

Legal notice, remember all these games are for fun...gambling on college games is prohibited.

Even if apparently 58% of employed persons in America engage in pools

"I took an AIDS test...so should you! " and some links

Now of course calling exes and stating such a line is not the best way to start your conversations. But, I firmly believe that all responsible people in my age bracket should take regular AIDS tests.

You all know that the SCV is at low risk for catching the High Five aka the Die Slow, but I still feel the need/urge to get tested regularly. Since I give blood fairly regularly I am not usually concerned about taking independent AIDS tests but, since I was barred for a WHOLE YEAR (thanks to the Malaria scare in Jamaica), this is the longest I have ever gone without a blood test (well at least not one forced by a family court...sorry mom for that joke, I apologize, I could not resist.)

Anyway to shorten the story, cause I could really go on and on...If you are afraid of taking the tests that force you to wait 2 weeks for results (like planned parenthood, I swear a friend told me about that one), San Diego offers a free one at its Family clinics and you get results in 20 minutes. Let me repeat...IT IS FREE AND TAKES ONLY TWENTY MINUTES.

Please friends, go get checked...and to my exes etc, I am clear...not that you had to worry about the SCV.

Ok some light hearted fare after that;

A woman had to be surgically removed from a toilet seat, I swear you cannot make these things up.

Dawn Wells, aka Mary Ann, got caught with Mary Jane, that is right, the innocent one from Gilligan's Island who is 69 got busted with ganja! I cannot help but laugh.

And of course I have to link re Eliot Spitzer, I will blog more on the hypocrite at a later date but suffice it to say for now...WHAT A MAROON! I chose a Texas paper to link to on purpose.

Happy Birthday...

To my brother Courtney! And to my cousin Simone!
That is it, no other blogging for today...they deserve it to themselves!

'That's Amore' recap via IM's with Erin

"I learned in America that Blondes and Brunettes, do not like each other" --Domenico


So I was Imming back and forth with my friend while watching this drivel so I will just use my comments to her as the blog...enjoy a little glimpse into my convos.

What scares me is that so many of these girls are college age and the majority are listed as students...so does that mean they go to college...?

"I am a natural blonde, and the carpet matches the curtains (if I had any)" -- I am sure your parents are proud of your honesty.

So they are now doing a pizza challenge, they have to wear a hat and make a pizza on top of their heads while balancing the pie and then riding a bicycle to some delivery point...I am not sure I am ever going to order pizza again.

I KNEW this would happen, one of the girls while using the cheese grater, basically shredded her hand...you mean no one in production realized that handing a bunch of chicks dumb enough to show up on a show like this, a utensil that can hurt them will GUARANTEE someone getting hurt. That is like going hunting with Cheney and being shocked if you take a few hits! "Oh Mr Vice President you shot me. How could this happen?"

Easily impressed girl: "Everything was leopard and black and it was really romantic" Really? That is really romantic...this girl must be a hit around pimps and 70s flashback junkies

"She showed me the bum, and what is weird is that I remember the bum more than the face"-- Wow, just wow, I would love to be in the room with this girl when she watches this again.

I am watching these girls prep hair using a can of hair spray and it feels like their fingers have not come off it for about 2 minutes...there is no way that the ozone can survive girls like this.

Of course lies are now being told, some girls attacked another girl with water balloons, then went around and told others that the attacked girl was the one trashing the place

(e-lite(PM): call me crazy, but i want my hair to feel soft to the touch should a guy decide to touch it
Calij (PM): hahah yeah, I have touched some girls hair in the bar and worried that I cut myself)- - - This was not exactly about the show but I thought it was pertinent.

Uh, so now they have been painted as statues and have to stand on pedestals and pose as human statues while balancing on one leg. The clock shows these girls lasting to the 40 minute mark (and one girl just passed out after getting off the pedestal). Is it objectifying women, if they voluntarily place themselves in stupid positions?

So now an ambulance has arrived, to take away the girl that passed out, so that is 24 hours and 2 ambulances, this is an awesome streak

Wow the girls lasted 50 minutes 17 seconds on one leg...that is amazing, I am not sure I can stand on 2 legs for 50 minutes in one spot.

"What's good about Christina is that she will probably wipe your butt, when you are old and cant move and you are crippled"-- Ashley 'The poet'

I talk ALOT (hell, I need a blog just to let some of it out) but damn, if you are on a reality show, on a date with the 'star' shouldn't you at some point think to yourself, "wow, he has not said a word to me, maybe I am talking too much and should let him get a chance to speak...?"

And let me end it with the words of the crazy blonde when she witnessed one of the girls being let go "Ciao bella, in American means 'Get the fu@k out'"

Awkward moment in the club...vol 2.342

This moment goes to my boy's comment: "Oh damn, is that pregnant chick having a drink?" To which her friend who over heard him snapped, "She is just bloated." In fairness to my boy, he was blitzed out of his mind and it was unfair to expect him to make rational statements but...wow. I actually thought he was going to have a drink in the face moment. And...I think most peeps were confused too, they just had the sense to keep their mouths shut.

Great meeting another member of the commonwealth in the bar, this great brit fellow and I had a great time ragging on some of the dancing and actions we were seeing in the club. In his words (and you have to sometimes just love the harshness of brits), "If that girl dances any jerkier we will have to hold her tongue and call for a doctor because she is clearly having an epileptic seizure, she should never be allowed near a dance floor ever again. In fact, allowing her to walk unassisted is probably a crime by itself, but allowing her to dance in public is an affront to evolution." (Ok so maybe the last sentence was mine, but I feel better pretending it was his).

Of course after a few more drinks and the passage of time, he confessed "she is really quite pretty, I just wish she would not dance." It is always weird being around British persons and realizing just how much their mannerisms, speech, and education are so much a part of the Caribbean. He and I spoke as if we went to the same schools, and had the same teachers. Granted I without fear claim that I went to the best of the best schools while in the island, or as all 3 schools (I refuse to count my brief sojurns at UWI or THE Priory) described themselves, I went to the creme de la creme of Nursery schools, Preparatory schools and high schools (after all Campion is a college while other competitors are merely secondary institutions). Kiddies to Mona to Campion...how can one go wrong in life?

(Sorry typing this on a MacBook, no idea how to add accents to Creme --just know that I am educated enough to know that it requires accents). (Man I am so jealous of my Bro's computer, the fact that I can barely understand it...makes me even more jealous, oh you green eyed monster)

One of the 2 men I love is coming into town! v.1.34

My bro arrives this afternoon, it has been ages since we saw each other. Bit crazy that we live 2 hours apart but we see each other about 3-4 times a year.

"That's Amore"

Welcome to the end of our society! I mean 70% of all TV is crap, 90% of all 'reality' programming is crap, but wow this new show on MTV with Domenico as the star has got to be one of the biggest steaming piles of crap paraded on TV.

I tried to avoid it, I wanted to avoid it, but I blame Erin, she made me watch it, dare I say tricked me into watching it. As Flav would say, 'she got real, psychologically with me'. She brought up what at the time seemed like a valid point "if we watched 'Shot of love' how bad can this be?" My answer at the time was "if the original was crap, and this is a copy of the original then it is probably going to be even worse" I stand by my initial assessment.

Sadly, I think I am still going to watch it.

Brief synopsis of the excrement that flowed through my DVR; one of the challenges had the 'ladies' jumping into a pool of spaghetti and meat balls and then trying to take as many balls in the mouth as they could manage without using their hands and then taking the balls from the pool to a bowl so that they could be added to the team total. Re read that paragraph (it was probably badly written - in a rush here) but yup you read that right, they had women trying to fit 'balls in their mouths' as part of a competition...no one saw anything wrong with that? I am slow to find objectification because too often I think it is just paternalistic, but wow, even I stood back and said, "damn this is bad." But of course the ladies dived right in and started bobbing like they were auditioning for the next Jenna Jameson flick. Heck 2 even started fighting in the pool - I could not resist a chuckle, after all they were fighting to put balls in their mouths...

Erin, I am mad at you for making me watch this, and disappointed at both you and Vera for not somehow making it on this show!

America ranks as the world's #1 incarcerator...and one in 9 black men my age are LOCKED UP

And no surprise, black men lead as the highest percentage of incarcerated individuals...what is surprising is that Texas and Kansas have acted to slow their rate of incarceration (and it is not via executions).

Read this article for yourself, educate yourself about the ills of our society and then try to make some change...even if it is just staying out of jail your damn self!

This paragraph almost made me cry "Four states - Vermont, Michigan, Oregon and Connecticut - spend more on corrections than on higher education, the report said."

"For some groups, the incarceration numbers are especially startling," the report said.

"While one in 30 men between the ages of 20 and 34 is behind bars, for black males in that age group the figure is one in nine."

The racial disparity for women is also stark. One in 355 white women ages 35 to 39 is behind bars, compared with one in 100 black women in that age group.

Word of the day...and assassin gets mad at me

It has been awhile since there was a word of the day blog so let us do a blog filled with them.
--Unnecessary. It was bloody unnecessary for that guy to work out wearing just boxer briefs, come on dude i know you are swoll and probably think you can do anything but come on man wearing briefs to work out?
--Amazement. Aaron stared at the machine in amazement when he lifted his own weight on the back machine, he then had the same look when he looked at the scale.
--OUTDATED. This one had to go in caps in fact it even uses another word of the day. Aaron stared in amazement at the guy walking in to the weight room with a jerry curl sorry let me state this again. A young man about my age walked into the weight room with the outdated hair style of a JERRY CURL. There is no excuse for that. Thankfully he used a towel. I have been joking for the last couple days that I am going to rock the flat top fade but come on man the jerry curl was played out even when it was supposed to be in style.
--Hmm. An expression Aaron had to utter when a young lady threw herself at him in the club.
--Disgust. The look Sand Assassin gave Aaron when he repeatedly said he would not take the young lady home!

Here's to the morning when Aaron realizes that yoga early in the morning after a night in the club is not the greatest way to recover!

You know how you know you love food? vol1.2

When you stare at food ads for a store that is already closed, just so you can think about meals to make.

- I have accepted the fact that I am a fat ass. My doctor took me off dairy products while recovering from the flu (apparently it triggers phlegm). The whole time that I have been off dairy I have been dreaming about ice cream. In fact I had thoughts of "screw it, I will risk coughing just to taste ice cream"

- I was flirting via AIM tonight and I brought up my desire for coconut ice cream. I just crave ICE CREAM damn it! I discovered coconut powder in my pantry, and could not resist using it in everything the last couple days.
- Coconut rice,
- Coconut bubble tea,
- Coconut water (not surprisingly...not that great)
- Coconut sprinkled over cookies
--No clue why I sometimes just latch on to a food item and run it into the ground.

Anyway tomorrow I go back into the doc and get the results of my blood tests, the only thing I am not being tested for is DNA (by the way blood tests...not that cheap!). So I had the thought that maybe I should just deep fry my breakfast tomorrow, cause it would suck to show up at the doc's office to hear "No more fried food!" and not have taken one last run at clogging my arteries.

Blood tests are one of the few things where you are happy to spend money to hear the words - "NEGATIVE" I am being tested for things like diabetes, cholesterol, triglycerides etc...please God let everything be good. After all, what is the point of losing all this weight if in the end I get bad news? Looking at the clock...it is 12 hours away...please be negative, please be negative, please - well u get the picture.

Oh by the way for all my fellow fat assers (it should be a word damn it) out there McDonalds is giving away free McSkillets this Thursday and Friday with the purchase of a Medium or Large drink (get a diet coke).

Purple is the new color of Spring...if you are a girl

I have noticed the last few nights around town that purple outfits are everywhere. It is amazing how quickly trends can take hold.

Purple is still not as great a trend as "Beard are in for 2008" but it has its place.

I need to roll out with uglier friends. Having such a good looking clique could seriously lead to some problems. Last night was a study in what women want. One member of the clique is so tall that he can tell me if it is raining 5 minutes before I feel the moisture and another member DESPITE his claims that he is not short, would drown if we passed through a puddle.

So rolling out last night was a bit crazy; rolling through the club I would have a girl smile at me, (you know 'give the eye') then I would watch their eyes roll upwards and discover that there was a head visible above mine (tall bastard). It did not help that some crazy chick was convinced that Assassin was John Mayer (out of classiness that I rarely exhibit I will not put a side by side of them up).

Then the short one was on a roll with girls below the height of 5ft 1. I mean the guy is a Svengali when it comes to short women.

Funny thing is, though I am semi-ranting, I do not suffer in the clubs. In fact I do fairly well. And as Assassin can vouch, I coach a great game when it comes to setting peeps up for success on the pick-up. Last night it just turned out to be my luck that the 'gangsta-boo' was the one that was interested in me.

Sheryl Lee Ralph WTH are you doing on Flavor of Love

You are married to a Pennsylvania state senator you are of Jamaican heritage, you are a strong independent woman, heck you are a Dreamgirl! I know you were on there as a motivational speaker but cot damn, I do not want to see you on this show. FOL is a guilty pleasure of mine, and like many guilty pleasures we do not want to see good people involved with it. Please SLR, do not reappear on anything like this ever again.
(side note, Damn girl you are STILL getting it done)/

"A baked potato? Are we in Russia"

I still maintain if a family member of mine ever shows up on Flavor of Love, I will have to disown her!

Elimination tonight was funny, Flav tried to eliminate a girl and could not remember her name...I guess that it is a clear sign that it is time for you to go if the person you are trying to woo cannot even remember your name.

Big Monday: Texas v those Aggie clowns

Photo by Eric Gay Associated Press
Huge basketball day for Texas fans, I know I have my DVR running to make sure that I do not miss the game. Now I just have to make sure that I do not accidentally stumble on the score before I get to watch the game. My phone is off, and I am not checking text messages either until I get a chance to watch the game.

Great weekend of sports! The Daytona 500 was amazing (I know it might seem weird that I watch but I love Nascar) that bump move to end the race was so well executed that I knew Tony Stewart had no chance the minute I saw Busch hook on to Newman's bumper. Unfortunately for Stewart his team-mate was caught up in traffic and could not get into clear air to give Stewart that last push he might need. Dodge cars owned the race, 6 of the top 8 were Dodges.

The next big thing for me was the Slam dunk competition. I have never understood why peeps say get rid of it...and replace it with what? It is fun let it continue, and if you saw this weekends competition you will agree with me. When Dwight Howard "supermanned (yup it is a word) that dunk" the arena went nuts! The best dunk for me was definitely the 'Birthday Cake' Gerald Green actually blew out a candle in a cupcake on the back of the rim, that was bloody amazing!

Ok some of the dunks for your edification
off the backboard


The Birthday cake


Superman that ohhhh




HOOK 'EM HORNS!

Happy Valentine's Day!

"What do you call it when Bill and Hillary get together for Valentine's day? --A fundraiser" from The Tonight Show. 2/14/08 (thanks DVR)

I love my downtown clique:
Cali J: Sup G, bringing a girl out tonight for V-day?
N: Nah, not really, I will be taking a girl with me but it wont be a date.
Cali J: Taking a girl out with you on Valentine's day...and it is not a date...smooth G, real smooth.

I love that most of the peeps in the clique manage to deny that they are ever in relationships. One of my boys has dated his girl for 2 years and still denies that they are in a relationship. Just amazing the commitment phobia that we all seem to share. Something tells me that is part of why we are such a good group, we all understand each other.

Hey Baby girl; "You remind me of my jeep!"

The 'Blackchelor' is BACK!

Tonight was the premiere of Flavor of Love THREE. How is this not a national holiday? I mean come on next week is President's day, the premiere of FOL should be a nationally recognized day of equal importance.

Chick: "I want you to call me Hotlanta"
Flav: "If I get with you your name is going to have to change to Mylanta" (I paraphrased cause honestly following along with Flav is not always the easiest)

They put twins on the show? Come on now, you know Flav is going to be hurt trying to do that math. By the way, what rational person wants to get into a 3some with their sister?

Bunz: "When it comes to the bedroom I will try anything once" --Word chick? Sure that is not a statement for the camera?

I know I say it at the start of every season, but dang, somebody might just 'get cut', I could definitely see someone leaving in an ambulance this season.

"I am taking the girls to the most romanTICAL places in the world" You have to love his use of words, the man is a poet.

At least nobody crapped on the floor in this episode.

Metafore "Nah Mean"

I am surprised this kat did not have a hit with this track. Of course if you are a west coast resident (and Cot damn How could Hill take Cali over Obama?) you will probably not get this song for another couple months, but trust me, they should be banging it in the clubs.

And the video is something pleasant to look at, Nah mean?



(Blog has been edited) This is why I should not post after a sleepless night!

Is 18-1 perfection suckers???

I took absolute delight last week in hearing that the Boston Globe had started taking pre-orders for a Book about the Pats football season called '19-0'. I was also tickled to hear that the request had been put in to trademark '19-0'. But what I found even better was that the NY Post then applied to trademark 18-1. Bloody fun back and forth.

I really, really love when ESPN starts running their 'best team ever' graphics, invariably the team seems to fail. Yes I know that if you have read this blog ever, you know I still gloat over TEXAS BEAT USC (SUCK IT TROJANS)!

What I found appalling in its silliness, was that for a couple days last week ESPN tried to sell sport fans that Tom Brady was much more dominant in his sport than Tiger was in golf! Let me say this now, there is no athlete as dominant as Tiger.

Brady as good as he is, was not the record breaker till he got Moss. Think about it, Brady is good, but it is not like he is not surrounded by weapons, Moss, Welker, Stallworth, Maroney, etc.

Woods is a solo act, hell he is an entity to be honest, Golfers come and go and he still endures, heck for awhile Mickleson even said Tiger was using inferior equipment and yet he was still winning.

No one is as good as Tiger, I never thought I would see an athlete as dominant as Jordan, but I think Tiger is that good, peeps wanted to see history with a 19-0 team. I am telling you, you see it every time Tiger swings a club!

Selah

Frozen nipples, American Idol and Big girls

This might be bad to say, but I am going to say it anyway: Tonight on American Idol 2 big girls showed up, 2 friends and I mean BIG girls, it is not mean to say they were big they were definitely big, I mean they were big like the camera panned out to get them in frame kind of big. Anyway they were doing a little back-story about the girls to say that though they were not sisters they were close and the only difference in them was the type of men they liked. But, the girls also mentioned that they liked "the same kind of food and the same things to do" and I literally sat up in bed cause I was laughing so hard cause in my mind all I kept saying was "OF COURSE THEY LIKE THE SAME KIND OF FOOD, THEY LIKE ALL KINDS OF FOOD and the thing they both like to do is eat!"

The bonus though is that they can really sing!

Seriously Ryan Seacrest is hosting the Super Bowl pre-game, what Richard Simmons was busy?

So it is no secret there is a Bar TOO near my apartment, tonight I met up with a friend on an off chance while she was parking her car, so we decided to meet up at the bar. Since it literally shares the block with my apartment I figured I would just walk down in a t-shirt and sandals after all I figured I would not freeze walking less than a block. Well when I hit the bar it was just above 50 degrees, all good, still t-shirtesque weather. But anyone who has spent time in SD knows the temp here can drop significantly at night over a couple hours. Well we spent a few hours in the bar and upon leaving I figured I would head over to the supermercado (Cali-J showing love for my Spanish friends) since it was only a few more blocks over. Well let me tell you this, when you are used to the weather being in the 60s and it suddenly hits 45 and you are in a t-shirt...you begin to think your nipples are about to fall off cause everything on you is so damn cold!

Let me add this, when cold, running in sandals is not easy, and wind, is definitely your enemy. Well that is what I got for not wanting to walk the 30 paces back to my complex and take the elevator to my apartment (ok I normally take the stairs but I could have taken the lift if I was feeling lazy)

Moral of story 45 = not t-shirt weather!

Scrabulous is a disease - losing is the cure

I love it as a Facebook application; in fact it is my favorite application, just above chess. I loved the game as a kid; I tried hard every few months to beat my parents playing the game. Then spent a couple hours applying salve to my emotional beat downs. I am 28 and have still never beaten my parents in scrabble. Granted we have not played in over 10 years but STILL, the record remains in tact.

Anyway, for a few years, I had forgotten about scrabble, and then I discovered the yahoo version of it, and realized I was addicted again. Played Sand Assassin for sanity during the bar study period and loved it all. For a couple years ‘Literati’ (aka yahoo’s scrabble) was the salve to my intellectual laziness, I could pretend that my brain was stimulated while playing a game.
My group
BUT, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO facebook had to try and ruin my life and introduce Scrabbulous. How has it affected me? Let me count the ways:
1. I am clearly not as smart as I thought I was (or my opponents just have the scrabble lexicon memorized – I vote this answer)
2. There are 109, 2 letter words and I think I have learned about 107 of them…such info must have pushed out other more important info right?
3. I actively boot up my computer to just check games
4. I sincerely (for a second) wish ill to my friends when they play all 7 tiles and score a bingo
5. Even winning a game is not satisfying if I have to worry for an instant that a friend could come back and win
6. I pretty much only use facebook to access scrabulous and chess
7. I look at my friends who have not added scrabulous as dull insects who need an intellectual kick inna their batties.
8. I hate my friends who have beaten me. (Ok hate is strong, but you are disliked – know that)
9. Seriously QI should not be a word! It feels like someone just made it up to get a scrabble win ages ago and then they just added it to the dictionary!

Scrabulous has affected me to the point that I created a facebook group about scrabulous. Me, the guy who is so Facebook deficient that I had to ask someone else how to change my profile picture.

So let me declare it here, SCRABULOUS IS THE DEVIL and YOU SHOULD DEFINITELY GET IT. Then challenge me to a game, so I can smoke you!

Open challenge to my other bloggers (especially the Canadian folk – Since we know you guys cannot spell) I am taking on all comers

Fox continues to destroy society. vol 2.3 and weight update

'The moment of Truth' is just another example of Fox's reckless disregard of the Nation's moral fabric...and I not so secretly like the concept of the show. I wish it could be a bit more fast paced but it is interesting listening to some of the questions that have been asked: "Do you think you will still be married 5 years from now?" "Do you think any of your friends have hit on your wife (or something like that)?"

Someone like myself would be horrible on that show, it is no secret that I keep practically everything hidden. Even with a blog that I update daily (almost) I still reveal very little of myself. My closest friends know so little about me. I keep secrets from everyone, not to hurt or protect but because it is who I am. In fact, most peeps use me as a repository since I am better than a diary and safer than any journal.

But I digress, the show is awesome, if you have ever wanted to discover uncomfortable secrets about your significant others or close friends.

Weight loss update, your boy Cali J has dropped another pound + since last week, it would have been 2.6 (you have to love digital scales) but then there was the unfortunate incident of 'this was a football weekend' The New Syrian Mafia, myself and O'Danny bwoy, went nuts on wings, pizza and beer all weekend I actually added 1.4 pounds between my weigh in on Friday evening and my weigh in on Monday.

"My hair is also adding weight", that is what I keep telling myself, once I finally shave up, that has got to release another lb. Assassin, the challenge continues, you are going down son! Shotta, you want in on this?

Heath Ledger has died

He was found dead in his apartment today. Pills were found near the body...

If downward dog is a resting pose, why am I so tired?

So I did yoga tonight for the first time ever, and the Cali J is proud to say he completed the hour. He is not proud to say, he thought he was going to have to quit like a punk! Yoga is a lot harder than I thought it was. Look I am not some idiot who just stared at it and went "I can do that". I went in knowing it would be tough, but damn I did not think that some of the 'poses' would be so tough.

The E'wanna be'Rin and I went to Kick Boxing on Monday and while I was not great at least I was able to keep up, and since I had lost 24 pounds since October (yes I am patting myself on the back) I figured, yoga could not be harder than Kick Boxing. Well the only thing I got right in that thought was that I would not sweat as much.

Adho Mukha Svanasana is the resting pose aka Downward facing dog and I love the name (cheeky I know but gosh I love it) but did not find it restful.

I actually found Urdhva Mukha Svanasana aka upward facing dog to be much more relaxing, though I wonder if a lot of that was just my mental un-comfortableness (that should be a word) with the way the pose looked?

We did not attempt Parsva Bakasana aka side crow pose, look at the link it is awesome, the instructor showed us how it would look but did not require it of us.

What we did do is the crow pose aka Bakasana and I am proud to say, I got up there for about a second or 2 before falling I mean come on it was my first day! Thing is, there is something very strange about resting one's whole body on their elbows in a room full of peeps, I know I am too tied to the modern world but I kept thinking isn't there some machine that could do this for me.

So I think it is obvious to my readers that I am currently single or hiding my latest relationship really well (either could be true but we will go with single for now). Yoga in Downtown San Diego, 'home of the beautiful people' is not the easiest thing for a hot-blooded single male. Hard to focus on clearing your mind and doing a good doggy with some blazing hot yogameister wearing only a white sports bra and skin tight dance pants beside you and another searing hot chica in a see thru dri-fit type shirt and shorts that would make Daisy Duke blush infront of you.

The instructor kept saying, focus on your breathing and I kept saying in my head "damn right, I do not want anyone to hear me panting" at least the good thing is that if they heard the panting they might have just thought it was from working out so hard.

Now I wonder if all my sweating was due to yoga. Anyway, I gotta tell you my peeps, Yoga is legit, and to my male friends who think it is a waste of time, come join me on a Thursday, 7.30pm at my gym, I guarantee you will have your heart rate elevated.

Oh and Azn Josh, you are getting whipped in Tennis tomorrow, so bring an ice pack to soothe your wounds.

Selah

Customer service woes changed to cheers and keep Aaron from Bling!

So every longtime (regular) reader of the Cali J, knows he suffers from serious insomnia. In fact if you check the times on most of his posts you will notice that they are at odd hours of the night, for instance this is being posted at 4.50am.

So I am a fan of late night infomercials but never buy anything from them. I hate impulse buying and rarely succumb to it, despite my love of clothing, I can walk through a store filled with sales/great deals and not purchase things I did not want/need.

But what I do know is this, the later at night it becomes the more things I hesitated to buy during the day seem much more practical or needed! To that end, I have been shopping for watch jewelry. My parents (who spoil me now that I know longer am a drain on the family resources by not living at home) gave me great gifts for xmas, my right arm is hanging in gold and my upper body shimmers in the smooth black green and gold of my jacket (I requested it cause seriously no need for my mom to go shopping when she can just send me to find my own gift). So I figured I needed to add some bling to the left arm to counter balance the right.

Sounds good so far, and during the day I looked at watches, found some great deals figured, hey I could get that, the price is not too horrible I will look great with that on my wrist, blah blah blah. But in daylight the little voice in my head said, "YOU currently have FOUR watches you wear in rotation, you cannot find a FIFTH watch, your 6th watch needs to be repaired so where on earth is this other watch going to go?"

Then it hit 2am last night, and I figured why not check out the site one more time. I immediately remembered that I wanted to get my bro a gift so I might as well buy him a watch too, then I figured to be fair his watch should be as good as mine, then since I already had 2 watches I might as well get a third to complete the order. So I purchased a LADIES watch, with the idea that I would give it to my Valentine. At this moment I should point out that I do NOT have a valentine, yet I was buying a watch for this girl? What girl? A smaller voice inside said I could also give it to my mom.

Anyway, I executed the purchases and immediately regretted them. Well not entirely true, I first thought, sweet I just got an awesome watch, then I looked at my night stand and saw 3 watches staring back at me...then I regretted the purchase. Symmetry was beautiful I think, 3 watches purchased, 3 watches staring at me!

So tonight since it was about 4am I decided to contact the company despite the fact that their site says no refunds all sales final etc. I then decided to (lawyer them) talk sweetly, explain my problem and humbly beseech a cancellation of my sale. Of course I initially had to go through the customer service trick of once your request is received the contact is terminated, but I persevered. I finally got a great young lady (and if you have seen me 'work magic' you can understand why I would love getting a lady as my customer service rep) who though she initially fed me the company line, took all my items off, and removed the penalties that the company normally charges, restocking etc, termination of accounts all that jazz - thirty minutes later.

I know most peeps just accept their fate when they make a bad purchase and I was in fact willing to bite the bullet but then thought "might as well try." I really think in this day and age with competition so fierce on the internet that as long as you are not shopping internationally there is really no such thing as "All sales final" when dealing with corporations.

Selah!

"I'm international, check my passport, but still in the hood ducking the task force"

Hard for me to understand why peeps are shocked that I would go home and come back with an accent.
In honor of my boys' actions last night...

"Ma got a big ol' ass and no stomach...I got a new chick,
She sent me off in the new six
She said she usually don't do this
But..."

"Up in the club, yeah I got that burner on me" Every player knows the favorite words to hear for either gender is "I usually don't do this"

"I told you I had the skreets on lock"
I love the chick at the start of the vid:

Fire bun fi JPS! How the ra$$ a whole island going to have a blackout?

How you going to be the sole provider of electricity to the island, boast about it pon you rahtid website and then plunge the whole island into a blackout? An all island bloody blackout? You know how damn foolish that sounds? An entire country without power? Are you crazy? (I would love to have been flying over Jamaica just as that happened - I can imagine pilots freaking out.)

Look I know we not rich as a country. I know we still on the come-up, but how we going to progress when we having an all island blackout and most peeps could not even get power back till 4 hours later, some longer?

Unnuu need a kick inna yuh batty! Man like me nuh even own candles (that are not scented, but that is a different story and if you nuh understand why man like me might have scented candles, then I can help you, you probably would not understand why I invite girls over for dinner either, but I digress) cause I do not expect blackouts.

This is what the Gleaner has so far, see how the man dem full of it? When something like this happens, you better tell the public immediately what is going. Y'all who read my blog alot know that I am anti calling for peeps being fired. BUT somebody need to get fired over this mess!

Strangely enough, I tried to access JPS' website to link in this blog (cause you know I like to be fair) and I kid you not THE WEBSITE IS DOWN!

Everybody a yell Cash Plus and Scotia Bank this and that, but the fassy them a JPS better look out cause man still have Christmas food in fridge them time a year!

"Light a candle, sing a Sankey and find your way home!"

A 'Rap-up' of 2007

Props to my boy Shotta Marc for linking me with this video. Skillz does this every year and this year is one of his better 'rap-ups'. Like SM pointed out, I love his reference to Akon and the Trini gyal. Time the world know seh you caan trust dem Trini gyal and you caan trust any of di eastern Caribbean gyal dem at all (especially SVG). Showah!

And for 2008, watch you mouth bout calling women "Nappy headed hos" Imus.

Are the bloody 80s back?

Is it just me or are we going through the 80s again? Bionic woman is on, American Gladiators, Knight Rider, Price is Right are big again! Paula Abdul is on TV again and a big deal (no MC Skat Kat), Regis is still on, American Idol is basically Star Search under a different name. Transformers was a hit, Miami Vice was released as a movie, Mr. T is doing commercials, Scooby Doo is doing commercials. The A-team movie is supposed to be released soon, a He-man movie is being worked on, the same for Voltron, heck there was even a Dukes of Hazzard movie, a TMNT movie and a DIE HARD.

Stallone deserves his own line: He has released both a Rocky movie and a Rambo movie despite being old enough to remember when Traci Lords was Britney Spears "Heroes never die...They just reload."

Did I mention a Bush is president?
All we need is a big spandex craze and we are in a downward spiral.

Oh and hey, a black man is once again an early front runner for the presidency...maybe the 80s really are back!

Thing is, I HATE 80s music, I think it was the worse time musically, EVER! There was a regression after disco and a backlash and peeps latched on to this hokey type of music and still view it with nostalgia, but the music is crap. Sorry 80s fans but it is crap!

Ok maybe not all the music was crap, but it definitely does not deserve the love that it gets. I am sure I have ranted about 80s music b4 but I do not care, I will rant over and over till it dies.

You know what I could stand to see? THE A-TEAM! I just love hearing that damn intro. And with modern explosions that show would be awesome. They would probably change the Jeep into a Hummer but the opening sequence could basically stay the same, change the war to Iraq or Afghanistan and it could work.

The only consistently good 80s music was Reggae/Dancehall (artists like King Yellowman "Zungguzungguguzungguzeng", Sister Nancy and Super Cat etc.) and Latin music (love that Miami Sound Machine, "the rhythm" definitely got me).

If you doubt me on the strength of 80s reggae look at how much 80s reggae has been sampled by non-Jamaicans (many of those bastards have not paid homage or royalties but mi will rail pon dat another time) "Zungazung" alone has been used by BDP, Junior M.A.F.I.A., 2pac, Dead Prez and P.O.D.

And never forget the power of Mr. Uglyman Loverman, SHABBA RANKS!

As much as I rail against 80s music, I really did like the 80s shows, so I am really happy to see the new Knight Rider (bold choice on the car) return to TV, hopefully it is not crap. Oh and there had better be cameos by The Hoff!

Cognac, friends and air mattresses

So tonight is another weird night. I am blogging from my air mattress; a law school friend of mine has my bed and I am lying on my spare mattress blogging and whipping Kami in online scrabble (to be fair she has whipped me so bad in the past that I have to comment while I lead the current game).

Weird thing about friends, when you respect them and promise to keep them safe, you do not even try to push the boundaries, hence air mattress and my comfy bed being enjoyed by another.

It was a good night, this first weekend of the year. Brought a new participant into the downtown Kats mix. The original Persian mafia abandoned the DH and I, but we replaced them strangely enough with a new Persian mafia.

Yes as the title says, I was pretentious enough to be drinking cognac, but I figured I earned that right after starting the night off drinking vodka at a rapid pace because it was a hosted bar for the first hour.

All the best for the New Year y'all and remember, respect yourself, before you respect anybody else...and my air mattress is comfy ;)

Historic win for Obama

He won the Iowa caucus which gives me just the perfect excuse to run my favorite political ad.

"Hey B its me"


I still "got a crush on" the Obama girl!

Britney and tired blogging

So even on a day when I thought I would not blog I hear some Britney news (on ESPN - I just had to point out the source) that just required me to pick up the keyboard. Britney's latest legal team has quit her custody case. Yes I used the term LATEST because this is her THIRD legal team since fall of 2007, that is third as in a method of saying THREE different legal teams have represented her in a custody case since fall and QUIT!

Custody cases are usually fairly simple especially when the female party is the moneyed party yet in this special case, she has managed to lose 3 legal teams. I warned friends early in this, and have mentioned it many a time on the blog..."The fact that K-fed comes out looking like the better parent in any situation is scary!"

I still love that one of the phrases my boy repeated often to end the year was "I know Britney is not what she used to be but I would still do her" [I paraphrased the last part, cause he kept slurring at the end of the sentence, almost like his brain cells were trying to kill themselves for what they were uttering]

By the way, if you are a mother 'fighting' to get your kids back, how do you miss a deposition claiming to be sick and go out partying the same night? Be real, are you only fighting for your kids cause you think it is the right thing to do and not cause you want to do it?

If you read to the end of the article you will see the other case she is involved in that can only cause one to smile and scratch your head some more

"These M & Ms are defective, some of them are Ws"

Rather funny line I heard tonight.
So I just discovered 2 shows on E network "Snoop Dogg's Fatherhood" and Keeping up with the Kardashians" (Kw/K) both have led me further along the path of belief that America is going down the toilet and it is being flushed by 'reality' TV.

To be honest, I really enjoyed 'Fatherhood' especially the part with Snoop and David Beckham hanging out together. In the list of places I would not have expected David Beckham to end up Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles was probably in the top 10. Adding Snoop as his companion probably raises it to a top 3. Props to Bex for trying to help Snoop cover when his wife busted him having fried chicken when he was supposed to be having salad. I also loved the fact that Snoop was eating fried chicken at 4am, it reminded me of the times Delz and I used to hit up the Hollyhood Roscoe's after a good night of imbibing (amazing the lines at Roscoe's late at night).

By the way Snoop if you are going to fake "signed Beckham" Jerseys you might not want to have them signed in your handwriting with the price tags still on them.

Kw/K is simply an exercise in statitude, and whoredom, watch it to feel better about your own family structure. I guarantee it is a feel good moment. Your family cannot be as dysfunctional as this group. Bruce Jenner, what happened to you man?

Funny thing is I did not even know I had the E network, I saw an ad for Snoop's show while watching a football game and had my DVR search for it. Interesting channel E, I had forgotten how crazy this channel was/is, it is definitely a channel created for excess and secretly I think I like it.

Happy New Year to ALL!

The Cali J and his family of companies wish you all the best for the upcoming year!

And to those in SD who saw the downtown fire news, yes it was the block next to me, but the Lord is good and I am safe and so is my place. Blessings for the New Year!

Oh and congrats G!

Merry Christmas

The family of Cali J and the Cali Jamaican group of companies would like to wish you all the very best this holiday.

Allow me a quick moment of non-modesty (some might say the C-J is never modest) I cooked a fairly significant portion of today's feast and got rave reviews. Which worked out well since I was sweating bullets until the moment my pops approved the meal.

Now that I know that they enjoyed it, my xmas feels even better. Now if I can just convince myself not to go to Special Delivery at this time of the night I will feel excellent...if the $4000 price my boy quoted me is legit I cannot in good conscience link a session on Xmas night for that price!

Another unbloggable night v20.07

You know a night was crazy when you run to your shower rather than to your room upon getting in just because you feel the scent of the night's debaucheries might be so strong on you that it might wake your parents and you need to shower them off immediately!

If you are privy to the Cali J's addition to the lexicon that is urbandictionary.com you will have an idea of why he had to shower so quickly

Jamie Lynn Spears is preggers! Tila Tequila and a lesson in economics

So I know a lot of peeps would say this is not shocking, but to me it is! Let us take a quick rundown of why I am surprised.

1. She is 16 and wealthy; teen pregnancy is on the decline among all social levels but especially among the wealthy
2. Her sister is Britney; if seeing that train wreck did not swear her off having kids nothing would
3. She is on a Nickelodeon show; shows like that tend to frown severely upon unplanned pregnancies and especially unplanned pregnancies by their teen-stars
4. Seriously Brit is her sister; come on, how could she practice unsafe sex with that role model as her sister???
5. Seriously condoms are cheap; no matter how much you might cry that you are spending on condoms...and if you are spending enough that you honestly have to cry about it then trust me, most peeps do not care about your pain...kids will always cost more than condoms do! Just a thought for those who are deficient in economic theory.

I saw the finale of 'A shot at love with Tila Tequila'...interesting finish, but the choice I expected, will not blog about it more since would not want to give away the finish but it was decent, as my boy Flavor Flav would say, nothing "too dramatical"

I love my parents' sarcasm vol 2.4

I love the fake surprise that my father exhibits any time he finds out that I am home at 1.30am on a Sunday morning. Peeps wonder why I am so caustically sarcastic and then they meet my folks and I get a knowing nod.

Love my mom's reaction to me being home: "What happened none of your friends wanted to lose their lives tonight?" Oh mom, you kidder! Back to the grind in the morrows, let's see if I remember how to play a piano!

Eating Raw Milo!

I do not know what it is, I do not know why I cannot resist it, I do not know why it calls to me; but, if there is Milo in the house I cannot help but pour a scoopful into my hand and begin to eat it.

This was all well and good when I was a kid, even when I was a teenager, but, I am a grown man, I really should be able to resist it…but, I cannot. Tonight I was craving a snack, opened the cupboard, saw a packet of Milo initially walked away, checked the other cupboards and the refrigerator, yet felt called to the Milo. So of course scoop to the hand and happiness ensued…

Now I am sitting here wondering what is wrong with me. How can someone be that addicted to dry Milo? “Yeesh G, get control of yourself.” One of the funniest parts of the situation (at least to me) is that I think I prefer dry over the actual finished product even though the finished product contains condensed milk which is another thing I used to eat out of the middle of my hand (do not do that one anymore, way too sweet and clawing).

This late night snacking will probably defeat the 4lbs I took off last week.

Beauty Pageants are AWESOME!

Oh man I must be getting old, I actually watched a Barbara Walters' Special and enjoyed it!

Now on to something that is keeping me fascinated despite the fact that I never watch Beauty pageants. I think the last time I watched a beauty Pageant was when Lisa Hanna was competing or maybe a few after that. Definitely have not seen one since I left Jamaica. But what I do like following is all the drama that seems to have accompanied beauty pageants this year. Let's take a peek at what has happened this year more than one winner of Ms.(insert state here) has lost their crown some because scandalous (still love that word) pictures showed up, a baby showed up in the belly or coke showed up in the nose. Miss USA herself had to be pardoned on national TV by that great arbiter of moral conflict Donald Trump.

I mean seriously you should check out the pictures of Ms. Nevada kissing, interacting with her public , and making sure that she is hands on with everyone (go check them out, I will wait for you here)...(told you they were crazy!).

When Ms. Congeniality came out it seemed so far fetched...now I am just waiting to hear about some girl going nuts and trying to take over the world. After all the Miss Puerto Rico pageant was already sabotaged with allegations of pepper spray to make up and clothing!


Finally the one closest to me; my home state of California has recently had its own scandal. The idiots running Miss California somehow miscalculated the votes, awarded the crown to the wrong girl, then had to take the title back and give it to the proper winner and peeps are now wondering why the girl that just lost (2xs) is planning to sue? These are accusations no beauty pageant wants written in a column "Silva, 24, lives in L.A.'s Koreatown and is of Ecuadoran and Mexican descent. Was she too ethnic? Too urban? Did judges find some dirty secret in her past at the last minute?"

"Paranoia, paranoia everybody's coming to get me"

This was one of my favorite songs in 1998. Then I found this awesome viral video. It is one of the better home-made videos this year. These peeps all work for the same tech company and apparently did this vid in one take, one day after work.

Looks like a fun environment...and their website says they are hiring.

Lip Dub - Flagpole Sitta by Harvey Danger from amandalynferri on Vimeo.

Cali J - just like clockwork!

Wake up, eat some bad food, feel bad about it, eat some ice cream, feel better, hit the gym at some late night point and work out to the point of being so sore that blogging is difficult. I swore I was taking today off from working out until today's dinner consisted of an apple (I started of so good), then a granola bar (low fat version - still doing well) then 6 cookies...*sigh*

"Bu-bu-bu-but wait it gets worse" I ate the apple, cookies and granola cause I was so sore and tired from working out combined with laziness brought about by watching excessive amounts of football (great games this weekend) that I just could not be bothered to cook or pick up dinner. So of course the A/C/G did not fill me up so I had a scoop of low fat ice-cream (with milk - so damn good), then I realized I needed protein so I broiled some bacon! At this point I realized "Cot damn this is crazy and possibly suicidal" and thus knew today could not be a day-off from the gym day. So it was off to go swim and jump rope. Now I smell like chlorine (despite 2 showers; how is it that you can never seem to get the smell of chlorine out of your nostrils for a couple hours after swimming) and I am so sore that I feel like Britney Spears after a Friday night (draw your own conclusion on that one).

Naked men, white kids, and me working out

So I rode to the gym tonight (let me point out again; I love San Diego, I rode in a T-shirt and shorts on a November night, meanwhile my boy is IM-ing this from Philly "I f-ing hate you, the temperature here is 32" to which I responded with "Too bad man, it is 65 here" I cannot post his reply). While locking the bike up near an ATM these young white kids rolled up and one was telling this story:

"Man my high school was 94% f-ing blacks 1% Asian and the remaining 1% white" (note apparently his high school did not teach math - which I thought immediately was going to be awesome when he tried to count his money coming out of the ATM)
- Kid then notices the 210lb Black man locking up his bicycle and gives the guilty I got busted start and pauses his story. He then nudges his companions another skinny guy and a girl that looked like the last time she saw sun it was a Disney movie.
- Not knowing what to do he pauses mid-story and immediately launches into
"I wonder how much this ATM is going to charge for getting cash"
- So of course I could not resist messing with him. I lock my bike, take out my lifting gloves, stand behind him at the ATM slowly putting on the gloves and say:
"Hey man why don't you finish that story" (if you have ever heard my voice you might understand why a kid that [may have been] telling a racist story would not want to hear it).
He responds" "Oh I was just telling them how many kids went to my school, that was it I swear" (voice cracks)
I continued: "Oh yea, that was cool man, so how much cash are WE pulling out?"
At that point I was barely keeping myself from laughing because these kids were definitely now concerned about getting jacked...just as he was about to stammer out a reply, it started out like this "uh uh uh Uh [glance around]" I saved him further embarrassment and said: "Nice meeting y'all, look out for those black kids, something tells me they hated you" and then hit the gym. (Felt like a great warm-up for lifting).

But the emotional high that I got from messing with that idiot kid was immediately removed when I sat on the locker room bench to adjust my shoes and the guy next to me who was already invading my personal space dropped trough. Now I have already gotten over my personal hangups of seeing naked men in the gym (did not see it in high school so never got used to it like my American counterparts), but I am still not used to having someone comfortable enough to expose themselves casually infront of me.

Bu-bu-bu- bu-but wait it gets worse, not only has he dropped trough right beside me, I am basically trapped because now he is naked, right beside me and in front of my locker (between my bench and my locker) oh and did I mention that I have my head down because I am adjusting my shoes??? I wanted to discreetly slide down the bench but no such luck I am hemmed in. So what do I do? The only thing I could do. NOTHING. I just stared straight at my shoes, tied my laces, pretended nothing had happened told him he was in my way and grabbed my towel out of my locker. Thing is, I understand that you have to get naked to go shower etc, but is it necessary to get naked in my personal space? And once naked, shouldn't you be hauling ass to either shower or put some clothes on? It is just weird to me for someone to get naked and then just stand beside me not saying a word, and not apparently moving to do anything about his situation. Sorry for the rant meatball hope this has not become your exclusive domain.

Finally, my other blog has allowed me a little artistic freedom, and take jabs (humorous I hope) at friends...just throwing out a casual warning - Assassin, FN, SSV, Baker, Robin, etc!

Quotes by pregnant starlets...you gotta love them.

"Because I hadn't said anything, people thought I was trying to keep it this big, bad secret, and that's not the case at all. I just wasn't commenting. I'm not being like, `Hey everybody, I'm pregnant!' I'm not that girl."

That was Christina Aguilera in the same magazine that she poses on the cover with her shirt open to reveal her pregnancy...I love Starlets.

Can Britney Spears really be pregnant again? Is that possible? I thought certain 'medication' made it harder to become pregnant?

American Gladiators is back!

I put an exclamation on the title but maybe that should be a question mark. I mean AG was cheesy even in the 90s I cannot imagine how extra cheesy it is going to be now. Yet, I am still kind of excited. It will not be a show that I will watch on even a semi-consistent basis, but I will check out a few of the episodes.

And if you doubt me on the cheesiness level check out the names of the "gladiators":
Original six Gladiators (from Wikipedia)

* Malibu
* Lace
* Gemini
* Zap
* Nitro
* Sunny
Unbeatable!

But the icing on the cake...the announced hosts for the New AG are HULK HOGAN and LAILA ALI, no really I am serious, I swear!

Man NBC must be desperate for programming!

Apple Pies and conveniences

I made 2 apple pies last week for thanksgiving weekend. For the first time ever I used a kitchen stand peeler/slicer/corer and I must say...it was awesome. I peeled, sliced and cored a dozen apples so quickly I did it during a commercial break of 'Dirty Sexy Money' (I just love that shows title). Now I am thinking I have to get the damn thing. That is always the problem with trying out anything cool that others have. I am used to sitting in front of a TV and painstakingly peeling apple upon apple and then hand coring them and THEN slicing them to a thin level.

Question is, do I want to purchase another kitchen item that will only be used once in a blue moon?

I loved the crust of the pies I made last week, I am actually not the biggest pie fan, but I am the biggest fan of pie-crusts. So much to the point that when I finished Robin's slice I ate the crust and ignored the filling. Tried out an egg-wash for the first time, it gives great color and allows a nice sheen to the pie topper.

Always my friends - Go with home-made crusts v store bought for gift pies...it always brings the joy!

IluvNY, Punks jump up to get beat down...

So I know there are those that love that cat Chance from last year. I am personally in the camp that thinks the kid is a gimmick, a show. I watched his 'fights' last night and in everyone of them he takes a step back when the cat is bigger than him. And in all his fights he waits until he is restrained before suddenly 'acting a fool.' I know I am a hot-head yet I hate fighting, but I will trash talk with the best of them. I never like to throw blows so I will sometimes jaw and jaw to the point that a fight seems inevitable. But if a fight breaks out, I do not then run behind the largest obstacle I can find and then start throwing words and drinks at my opponents. (sorry I know the above is convoluted but I am tired - forgive me)

I think Lil Wayne aka Weezy says it best: "I aint never ran from a playa
and i damn sure aint bout to pick today, to start runnin" --Duffle Bag boy

That being said, starting fights for no reason is childish, going out looking for a fight is ridiculous...step your game up people and rise above.

"Go get your weave fixed...you silicone breast wearing bitch" Hahah classic, I do not remember hearing implants described as 'silicone wearing'. The kid may have been fake and he may have been faking that he likes women, but he delivered a great line.

Phenomenal HIMYM tonight...

One of those episodes that while watching it you know you are going to have to view it a second time just to get all they joy out of it. How on earth did I live before DVR? Badly, that is the answer BADLY!

I weep for America, you might ask: Why? And you ask that because you know I will tell you. I weep because Nickelback has an album on the billboard charts that is now over SIX TIMES PLATINUM. Let that seep in, I am telling you that SIX MILLION copies of a Nickelback album have been sold.

So after that shocking discovery I had to check and see who else has topped 6 million and saw Avril Lavigne, Limp Bizkit, Britney Spears, 50 cent and others(just check the link). We are DOOMED AS A COUNTRY. On the plus side, if I release an album I just have to make sure that my lyrics are repetitive, inane and carry a catchy hook. I am thinking Grammy baby!

In anticipation of tomorrow's HIMYM...slap bet

So there has been a lot of setup for Monday's HIMYM episode so I expect great things. In anticipation of the countdown of the Slap Counter. I am dropping in this clip of Slap Bet.

By the way, if you are not watching Mayweather/Hatton 24/7 and you are a boxing fan, you are depriving yourself of a visual treat. I said it in the buildup to the De La Hoya fight...Floyd is bloody crazy! And that makes him awesome to watch. The kid is a machine, I know Hatton is undefeated and the pride of the British Empire but Floyd is an all time great. My only fear is that all the craziness that surrounds Floyd must distract him.

On to the Slaps
"What would you expect? You have seen my Penis!"

One year ago...

My boys and I consumed insane amounts of alcohol because bar results came out and we had passed. Tonight, we consumed insane amounts of alcohol because we were happy that it was a full year from one of the worst days of our lives and we were toasting those of our friends that had passed.

Until you live it, you will never understand the fear that comes with waiting for the bar. I have seen dead bodies, I have had a root canal, I have had the last rites given to me, I have been dumped and yet I still cannot think of a worse day than the day I had to wait for the bar.

Tonight was off the chain, I cannot say why, because it is still at that delicate stage of "Damn son your girl is crazy" but it was good.

Good to see the Persian mafia together again, even if one of them rolled out like a preppy kid from one of those horrible 80s movies. And that includes 16 candles, Top gun and Can't buy me love...they all sucked. But it does not include Princess Bride and The Breakfast Club, but it does also include 80s music. Yes I said it...The 80s are the most over-rated period of music EVER!

Time to set a dinner menu.

CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL WHO PASSED THE BAR! Bad luck to my friends who were not that fortunate, these things happen and you will be able to move on, even if right now seems unbelievably painful.

THREE AM TEXT MESSAGES!

Now most people know what it means to get a text message or call past 1am! And we all know nothing good happens after 2am. Well at 3am I received not one but 2 text messages back to back. One would think it must be an urgent request. Well I flicked my phone over to see two text messages from...SPRINT. Yup my phone company gave me a b-text in the middle of the night.

Of course this means that I now have to call them later in the day and raise Cain, cause beyond the fact that they annoy me by sending me the texts they sent them in the middle of the NIGHT!

Glad to see that Arrested Development is back! I was a big fan of the album "3 Years, 5 Months & 2 Days in the Life of..."
Hopefully they come to SD at some point!

Happy Birthday

Tricia. Love you coz.

"She's a keeper, just keep her somewhere else"

That is what Robin dropped in regards to Ted's new girlfriend and I fell out of my chair laughing.

"Do raisins have a brain?" So starts the Smart Start creepy cereal ad! What makes them think that I want to think about raisins having a brain when eating my morning meal? It does not help that raisins already kind of look like brains.

This OJ Vegas thing is already turning out more entertaining than I expected!

The Visa is faster than cash ads only make sense when ordering fast food - No offense but many of those workers seem to go brain dead when dispensing change. Otherwise the ads are visually appealing intellectually silly.

I should never ever, call you.

I Love NY has opened my eyes up to what a bunch of 'thugs' will do to get a 'lady'.

I love the Xmas period because it brings back Egg nogg ice cream; only one problem - This should not count as the Xmas period, it is not even bloody Turkey day yet.

Hahah I just saw a clip of competitive bar-tending, yes it is as bad as it sounds!

"War-lord trash-a-gold" Do not believe me? Ask him! Great you-tubes for my American friends who I am constantly trying to teach patois.

Jane Seymour is still getting it done!

I have decided that 8 o'clock is the cut off time for young kids to watch TV, after that the material becomes decidedly adult, and that counts for the comedies and dramas.

How could she do that? v3.43

One of my boys found out that his girl was cheating on him. But he found out in a fashion calculated to cause pain and my heart goes out to him. Thing is, no matter how bad one feels it seems like you can always find someone worse off than you. I mean plenty a time I have felt like I was done wrong by a woman, but never in the fashion that he was hit with.

So my boy is hurt to the point that he is plotting criminal activity (nothing physical) but still criminal. I was amused by the fact that I had to counsel against illegal activity and replay the things that are illegal to do to others...no matter how good they might feel.

Thankfully (as far as I know) I have never been cheated on. And long time readers will remember that I go by the Mario Winans' school of thought. Thing is, if someone has hooked you up, and given you everything you need in life, but yet you still feel unfulfilled, maybe it is better for you to just walk away rather than being so underhanded.

Remember though, sometimes things happen, sometimes you might do things that are outside the normal bounds of a relationship (not just saying that cause I might feel guilty about my past or anything) but there is stretching the bounds of decency and then there is swallowing what is not yours! Make of that what you must, I have only been allowed so much permission.

You know things are bad when something that happens to a friend affects you so badly that you are actually mad at the ne'er-do-well.

I close with this:
"Somebody said they saw you
The person you were kissing wasn't me
And I would never ask you
I just kept it to myself

I don't wanna know
If you're playin' me, keep it on the low
Cause my heart can't take it anymore
And if your creepin, please don't let it show
Oh baby, I don't wanna know"

-- I don't Wanna know by Mario Winans

Hot girls always make me wary!

So tonight I was hanging out with 2 rather hot young women on the harbor cruise. There is a slight problem with hanging with hot women; not the fact that they know they are hot; not the fact that they can be cocky (these girls were funny not cocky); not even the fact that you sometimes wonder if they are just spending the time looking at their own reflections; nope the major problem is that every moron in the damn spot wants to step to you and your companions.

It was definitely a confusing night though, combine the fact that the girl to guy ratio was the best I have ever seen in San Diego and probably in the top 3 of girl-guy ratios I have ever seen with the fact that 80% of the peeps were drunk or toked out of their minds and you get a night filled with peeps making out on the dance floor and peeps trying to finger bang (and if u do not know what the last one is - then I applaud you for your innocence). I almost felt like I was in college again :) !

It is also always cool/fun to roll with your boy who is a promoter, it leads to a VIP experience and allows you to roll in anywhere. Combine it with the cockiness of wearing a shirt that has pink, orange and purple in it, and a blazer and forgive me if I SWAGGER a bit when sauntering into a bar!

A Shot at Cold Sores with Tila Tequila, v.2.23 (shout out to Mike)

"I need at least 9 times a day" So hearing that in the background I figured it must be her talking about drinking water...nope. This is how many times a day Tila Tequila claims she HAS to touch herself and yet they make all those false claims about men and our urges?

So I have always maintained that I am afraid of having a girl because I know what boys are like and I would be afraid of having my daughter out in the real world, but now...Yeesh, this show is making me afraid of just having any kids. I would be mortified if any child of mine showed up on a show like this.

I know reality shows are the quick road to C-list stardom for alot of peeps, but if my kid ever told me they wanted to go on one of these type of shows I would immediately offer to pay them whatever money they would make on the damn show just to stay of it. I would tend allow them to drop out of school for a year to go to acting school, anything to not have them ridicule the family in such a fashion...Then again no kid of mine could be moronic enough to ever go on a show like this.

Still not sure how on earth Tila Tequila is this popular, she lacks the charisma of a Flavor Flav, or the sheer craziness of New York, her personality seems like it was manufactured with lead paint and her 'beauty' is average in terms of Hollywood. So props to her because clearly she knows how to market herself!

Just a thought MTV, if you are showing a replay of a show that ends with an elimination, it is a bit silly to show a promo of the next week's episode showing who is up for elimination, kind of ruins the suspense of the epi I am watching!

Oh and for all those peeps who have just been watching hoping for a cat-fight, next week is your week.

San Diego complete booze ban on beaches

So the city of San Diego has finally done it...Booze is completely banned on all city beaches! I have been in San Diego 4 plus years and this issue constantly comes up.

I personally do not believe that alcohol needs to be banned on beaches, but then again, I have not had to deal with the rowdy idiots that make life hell for the peeps who live near PB.

I would MUCH prefer a ban on smoking on the beach, I have never been bothered by someone drinking next to me on the beach, but I have definitely been bothered by smoke blowing over from the person sitting next to me.

Next they should ban those roided up fools that are constantly trying to take up space on the beach to show off to their overly bleached, overly (spray) tanned, overly waxed barbies...though on that last one I might just be bitter!

An interesting article on marriage

I read this article while watching the game...amazing what I will read while watching peeps beat their brains in (go Colts - I hate the Patriots) and it led me to some thoughts. The writer has in my view missed the point of marriage. She appears to think of marriage as the bringing of 2 parts and the retention of separate but equal entities. BUT, I disagree! If you have read my blog you know I am not the most sentimental of persons but what I do value is marriage, trust and love.

A marriage is not just about 2 people coming together to share things, a marriage is about 2 people coming together to become ONE! The bible says "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" I can understand a marriage where both persons are temporarily separated due to jobs etc, but to willingly choose to live such a lifestyle is not a marriage but an arrangement of convenience.

SELAH

- Your Sunday word.

Can you truly be over someone...

If you can still become jealous over them? I have said it before but it still haunts me: Sometimes you realize that you are just not over something or someone. The problem lies in having that feeling for more than one thing. Oh well, recognition of the stresser is the first step to making sure you can handle it. Even if it leads to painful text messages.

Hingis out thanks to coke...

So Martina Hingis has a positive test for cocaine and suddenly resigns? Thing is, even if she is 100% innocent it seems weird to suddenly retire.

Sucks to see a once brilliant career end like this. I wonder if the 2 years off were spent partying.

Happy Birthday to...

The princess of the ATX Zandra!

"Tell your girl to stop yanking on my carrot!"

When your costume allows you to start a conversation with the above words you know that the night is going to be FAN-wait for it -TASTIC!

I truly believe that the fact that so many girls dress 'sluttily' in their regular nights out, that Halloween has been damaged as the "slutty night out." Kind of along the lines of, if you have top quality wine every night it is hard to be impressed by top shelf wine on a weekend. Well, if girls are constantly showing it all off, on a night when the showing it off comes with a garish color pattern, you tend not to be so shocked by it.

In fact a young lady tonight was literally wearing lingerie and for a while I thought it was just a dress.

So rolling out with my boy John (J.lo the tall Azn) was a bit of a treat tonight since I had a built in wing-man and someone who is just as willing as I am to crack a joke, no matter who is in front of us.

(an aside- John is clearly Asian, and if you have seen me [I am clearly black] this white chick came up to us, started flirting, then dropped the bf bomb which of course meant that I started tuning out but then she said something that dragged me back into the convo..."Hey I am going to tell you a joke, I hope you do not get too offended" at this point I knew it was going to be a bad and probably racist joke, she did not disappoint. I have no clue what makes peeps think it will be cool to drop that to peeps they do not know...to John's credit he seemed to take it well...meanwhile I am half lecturing her but in mid sentence trail off cause some girl grabbed me by the tail and told me we had to take a picture - good times)

So I have discovered, girls cannot resist fuzzy out-fits! I have also discovered that fuzzy out-fits cause you to sweat out pounds of fluid. I came home and the stuff I wore to protect my skin from the costume was dripping wet!

I never understand peeps who need X to have a great time in the club. If E is the only way you are going to have fun at a party, maybe you should not go to the party. Nonetheless, watching this kid go nuts in the bar while on E was an amazing experience and it brought a lot of fun to the proceedings, even if some of it was wondering when he was going to pass out.

It was also worth the trip to see that John has as bad a time at reading signals as I do. Some chicks made eyes with us, and neither of us knew what to do...good times!